Tepid Takes: The Snow White Teaser (2025)

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I guess this more of a Lukewarm Take. 

I’m not going to be mean to the actors BUT most other aspects of film are fair game and the higher ups on this movie are the ones to blame.

I’m so over these remakes, I just do not care about them. The last one I watched in its entirety was Cruella and it was only to get sometime out the house, long story. I skipped through parts of Aladdin and I gave up watching The Little Mermaid, I do still sort want to analyze the costumes from that movie because what is happening Disney Live action costumes versions? Let’s put a pin in till a later section because I have thoughts, probably too many thoughts about movie costumes.  

 Also these are knee-jerk reactions to the teaser ultimately the “feelings” have no impact, I do not really care all that much.

Anyway, Let’s Get into the Snow White Teaser Trailer

Oh boy, trying to make “Whistle while you work” epic doesn’t cut mustard tones of this movie. I think the marketing team was forced to use it because Snow White couldn’t sing “Someday my Prince will come” or “Wishing Well” because those songs are about wanting love and we can’t have that anymore can we? Strong leaders who are female characters can’t want love, men can though, that is fine. The vocalization from that “Wishing Well” COULD have work but it would have reminded the audience of love so probably not at good choice for the music. So that just leaves “Whistle while you work” in that off-kilter Lana Del Rey style that Disney remakes seem to love.  

Just no to the Cgi animals and dwarves, especially the dwarves. No, No, A thousands times NO! I wonder why Disney remakes these “live-action” movies when most of are Cgi? I mean the answer is Money but still it likes that Cyrano quote, “I ask for cream. You give me milk and water.”

I hate Snow White’s haircut. Snow White’s hair in the animated movie looks like it’s pinned up which makes it look short, or if not that, is curled to make it looks shorter. If they had WANTED to go with short hair then go for homage to the late 1930s. As it in the teaser, it looks really unflattering.  I HATE to bring it up -especially since others have already – but it looks like Lord Farquaad’s hair. Who thought it was a good idea? They test these things during pre-production so who signed off the Lord Farquaad 2.0??? WHO?  

I despise “Evil Queen’s” costume. Sure it looks “evil” but more in like a cheesy 80s sci-fi flick way. That is a vibe I could get behind if that was the aesthetic of the film but when you make Regina’s OUAT costumes look subtle then there is a problem. This is a major motion picture for f-sake, they had a budget why do the costumes look cheap?  I guess a point for a wimple, I guess. It feel so much worse knowing that Sandy Powell did the costumes, she did the costumes 2015’s Cinderella so what happen here? I don’t dislike Snow White’s “reimagined” costume but it also looks like the most obvious take on the costume one could do for a live-action movie. Also it has the same sleeves as 2012’s Snow White and the Huntsman. Her yellow skirt looks like Powell used the same layer approach as the Cinderella gown but I don’t think the semi sheer fabric over a shimmering under-layer works for this movie as it’s not a magical dress, she wears it to pick wildflowers.  From what little I can see of Snow’s maid costume I do not like it. Oh well at least Powell got paid, at least I hope she bank off it.

That cape flip at 0:46 is a straight lift from OG movie and it made me roll my eyes. Also does this Evil Queen have a name?      

I feel like Snow White is one of the most misunderstood Disney main characters because her seemingly passivity gets interpretative as weakness and she is not. Snow White displays leadership traits, just on a small scale. She got seven men to obey her in a few minutes and wash their hands. She’s also sassy. Her characterization was from different time, right before WWII. Snow White didn’t need to figure herself out or struggle to be understood, she knew who she was and got the job done with no whinging. She was a character for the late 1930s. 

I feel nothing from this teaser aside from minor confusion and major apathy. 

A Super Tepid Take on the Quasi (2023) Trailer

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On Tuesday March 21, the trailer for Quasi dropped. Quasi is the Broken Lizard satirical take on The Hunchback of Notre Dame or that is what the people say. From this trailer I do not see it.

What Quasi has going for it…

Sure, there are somethings in common with Hugo’s novel and/or other adaptations. It takes place in medieval France and there is a hunchback named Quasi, which is a nickname of Quasimodo, but that’s a far as it goes according to the trailer.

This trailer poses three questions.

First being what makes a good trailer? I have seen great trailers for bad movies and bad trailers for awesome movies. Trailers are an art form. One has to give people just enough of the film that people want to see more. From this trailer and reading comments on social media, this trailer is for people who are Broken Lizard fans already and also want it mixed with a bit of Monty Python-type of humor.

From this trailer, it does seem like comedy troupe wanted to a comedy movie set in medieval period but wanted/needed to ground it in already known story. The general public knows of The Hunchback of Notre Dame as it is an old novel but most people don’t know the story that well. All most people might know about the novel are the basics. Quasimodo is a Hunchback who rings the bells at Notre Dame. So it a good base for whatever story you want.

Which bring us to the second question, What makes a Hunchback adaptation an adaptation of the story? What elements are needed? Very simply, one needs a Quasimodo character, an outcast who has deep reverence for a specific place. Does it HAVE to be a cathedral? It helps but it not specifically needed given the story. It has to be a place where people align themselves, a place that forms a sense of identity and connections. Then you have the foils to Quasimodo. An Esmeralda character who is also considered an outcast as she is a member of the Travelers but she beloved by the public as well as beautiful. And a Frollo-type character who is part of the community and is mostly respected because of his position but not loved by anyone and is for most part is alright with that since he considers himself above the common masses. I would say those core-elements are needed to convey the basic plot of novel, there are exceptions but for the MOST part those elements in some form are needed.

Thoughts on the Trailer

So what did I think of the trailer for Quasi? Umm…. I didn’t. It’s not my style of humor and I wouldn’t say I have high-brow humor. I have been known to like dumb stuff.

If you find this style of humor funny that is great, humor is very subjection but I didn’t find it funny and I’m failing to see The Hunchback of Notre Dame in this “version.” Broken Lizard can do whatever medieval comedy movie they want but don’t peddle it as a movie version of novel if just in name only.

The news outlets were calling it a satirical or spoof of the novel but I’m not seeing even that much. If the Hunchback character was named anything else I don’t think it would change a thing within the story, it’s just to get people to think it’s the novel with nothing else of the novel is there.

An Illuminating Quote

Here’s a quote from Jay Chandrasekhar about the movie “I will tell you this, we have a movie called ‘Quasi’, which we made. It’s going to come out in December on Hulu, and it’s a 13th-century French … It’s like murder, assassination, mystery. I play the King of France, Paul Soter plays the Pope, and Steve Lemme plays a hunchback. And it’s a big international sort of … It’s a ‘Monty Python’ movie.” https://collider.com/super-troopers-3-script-update-jay-chandrasekhar-comments/

Judging from the quote it doesn’t SOUND like they were originally aiming for a Hunchback version either.

So yeah while I was wrong in my assumption that Kevin Heffernan would play Quasi(modo) when in-fact Steven Lemme is playing the Hunchback character, I feel wrong calling this movie a Hunchback of Notre Dame adaptation.

I wouldn’t have known about the movie if wasn’t being called a Hunchback version and the trailer is giving me little to support that it is one. Especially since an actor in the film called the titular character “a hunchback.” It seems that the troupe wanted to do a Monty Python and the Holy Grail type flick mixed with their brand of humor and to make the project marketable they named the Hunchback Quasi and labelled it as a spoof for subterfuge.

So the third and final question is should Quasi even be reviewed as a Hunchback adaptation???

Disney new stuff Tepid Take

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Here is my super off the cuff Tepid Reactions or Tepid Takes to the some new stuff from Disney

Disney’s newest Pinocchio…

Let’s start with the newest remake on the block, Pinocchio. Apparently there is also new Pinocchio this year including a Paul Shore movie, a dark looking video and the upcoming stop motion Del Toro version. I half-think Disney rushed this to get ahead of Del Toro’s

Now personally, I only ever saw the 1940 Pinocchio once in school. I never liked it. I like Figaro and Monstro end of list. So this was always going to be super pass for me. I’ve seen reviews on this and they do not recommend it. Skip it do anything else with your time, you can never get your time back. (The video is from a reviewer who saw the movie I just didn’t want to post the trailer or get picture)

Did Once upon a time do the live action thing better? Remember Pinocchio was a big part of the first season. In fact he is the reason why the story happens the way it does…..

Trailer for The Little Mermaid

The Little mermaid teaser trailer. The ONLY issue I have is the lighting. It’s dark. Why? Because it’s a teaser trailer and the effects are not done. It could why her tail is super day-glow but everything is not because Ariel tail color is like a point pride. I think I read that somewhere.

Ultimately I do not care who Disney casts, I really do not. No one cared with Once upon a Time when they did the same thing. The trouble is did Once do these live action remakes better??? I think they did……

I will save judgment for a full trailer.

Disenchanted

The Enchanted sequel trailer….. sort of liked it no lies. Probably will watch when it comes out. Do I think it will be the best movie of 2022? No probably not but I doubt it will be the worst and that is at least something.

I’m most liking missing stuff. I know there was Star wars news. I know there was a news piece that the Hunchback version is still in the works. Which good or terrible is fine for me. THOUGH it would be interesting how the studio could make it worse. Can one make the gargoyles worse? Yes. Or could they create something far worse than the gargoyles? Yes.

I do think that since Hunchback is a lesser movie in the studio’s option because of money that they will just leave the production to it own thing which could result in a better end production. OR the executives could meddle as means of over correcting giving us something very bad. We shall see when ever this movie comes out with some pictures or a rushed teaser trailer to show investors or the D23 crowd.

Hot Take on Aladdin Trailer and Frozen 2 Teaser

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Well maybe it’s more of a tepid take.

Starting with Aladdin. This trailer is  really underwhelming. There is no vitality in this movie. Not going to be too harsh since it’s a minute trailer but there isn’t anything blood-pumping, nothing exciting, nothing to get one hyped for a fun adventure. It’s more dream-like, like a soft lullaby maybe that is what they were going for, more mystery. I guess that could be a bold choice with an Aladdin remake.   

Then there is Will Smith’s Genie. First, it’s a no win scenario. People didn’t like him not blue when the first set of pictures were released and they don’t like blue. But more than that it’s nearly impossible to adapt the Genie from Aladdin since so much of the character was Robin Williams.

Either the film needed to just find someone to outright copy Williams’ performance (like they did in the Aladdin cartoon) or they needed to make a whole new characterization. Instead they went for the middle. Again no win.  Personally, I would have gone for a whole new thing for Genie.

Then there is  the Frozen 2 trailer. This is a teaser trailer so there isn’t much of context for what is happening but it is definitely the opposite of the Aladdin trailer, it’s all hype.

Frozen has gone into the realm of serious action movie.  There is training montage, Anna has a weapon, Kristof is riding Sven maybe into battle, who knows yet? Has Frozen gone Skyrim? Maybe. I personally do not know how to feel about this one. More confused than anything.

Also it’s important to keep in mind that trailers are super misleading so this could all be just weird marketing.   

Edit from 2021 – It’s been over a year since these films were released. I still have yet to see the Aladdin remake but with regards to Frozen II when the trailer dropped the film wasn’t even done so in hindsight there was no real context to what was showcased in the trailer, it was all cool hyped. Which was and is fine.

I could sit here and bemoan the fact the Disney doesn’t have more of a vision of how the plot is going to unfold before going into the actual film making process BUT I also have a limited amount of knowledge of film production, so moot point. I do recommend watching the docu-series of the making of Frozen II on Disney plus.