Special Note- All this month every Wednesday there is will  be some very scary Anti-Hypothetical Casting posts.

Jane Lynch picture image

Jane Lynch

 

When it was first suggested to me to by Esmee I actually confused Jane Lynch for Jamie Lee Curtis, I don’t watch Glee. However I did see her when she was in an episode of Arrested Development  and in Christopher Guest’s Best in Show and I can say she is completely wrong in type for Sister Gudule.

Jane Lynch as Coach Sue Sylvester Glee picture image

Jane Lynch as Coach Sue Sylvester from Glee

First off, Jane Lynch is a comedy actress so that would mean for her to be cast they film would have to be silly AND follow Esmeralda’s backstory. Wait a sec did they already to that? However even in the 1999 French parody version, Sister Gudule’s counterpart was not a major characters. There is just something wrong making a woman who lost her chid in to a role that would NEED a comedic actress.

Jane Lynch picture image

Jane Lynch

Second, Jane Lynch is a tall lady at 6 feet, she doesn’t seem like a delicate flower. Though maybe Sister Gudule isn’t a delicate flower but she is Esmeralda’s mother and her nickname of Chantfleurie seems to indicate a small fair lady.

Jane Lynch picture image

Jane Lynch

 

Jane Lynch is one of the last people I would except to play Sister Gudule even if they did a comedic version of the story.

Moodiness Esmeralda (Maureen O'Hara) 1939 Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Moodiness Esmeralda (Maureen O’Hara) 1939 Hunchback of Notre Dame

The 1923 version staring Lon Chaney maybe considered the monster movie of the Hunchback pantheon but the 1939 have a far more scary-ish scene.

Ok, it’s not scary but it has a very dark moody tone that make it’s uneasy. As Esmeralda flee from Notre Dame after seeing Quasimodo, he stalks in the dark  narrow streets.  If we had seen Quasimodo before then so we did know what lurked in the night it would have been more scary. Of course that means we would have had the King of Fools scene so yeah that would have happened. But the dark slow-paced unsettling quality  of that makes it feel more scary than anything in the 1923 version. Though Monster Movie doesn’t equal horror but still.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iwb1izzaic4

The Hunchback of Morgue is a 1973 Spanish B slasher movie staring Paul Naschy, who had quite a following.

Let me be perfectly clear, I didn’t not watch this movie. I had thought about watching it and making it the principle  movie this month but when I learned what this movie did to  rats I said Noop. So this just an overview look at what I assume is a dumb horror movie.

If you thought this movie had any recemblance to Quasimodo and his pathos you would be mostly wrong. It’s only this in common with Hugo’s story is that a Hunchback named Gotho, who is Of a place and he a loved a pretty girl who was nice to him and dies. Actually maybe that is enough.

Unlike Notre Dame’s Hunchback, Gotho is not very smart and is tricked into killing people for the sake of bring his love back to life. Most of the clips I saw was Gotho killing people, one dude in acid because it’s horror movie.

Considering I have no love for Horror and or slasher movie I don’t feel like I missed anything but watch it   you like cheesy B horror from the 70’s.

The Dark Crystal picture image

The Dark Crystal

When the world thinks about the Legacy of Jim Henson, it typically thinks of the glory of the Muppets. However Henson did more than just the Muppets in his career. We have looked his 1986 movie, Labyrinth which was a light-hearted adventure featuring human characters. By contrast the 1982 movie, The Dark Crystal is a much darker movie featuring all puppets.

Jen with the Skeksis Chamberlain The Dark Crystal picture image

Jen with the Skeksis Chamberlain

The Dark Crystal starts with some backstory about a thousand years ago a magical crystal cracked and two races appeared, the icky Skeksis and hippie Mystics. The Skeksis seized control and used the crystal to replenish their lives. The also killed a races of elf-like creature called the Gelfling because their a prophesy about how a Gelfling will heal the shattered Dark Crystal.

Among the peaceful Mystics lives the last Gelfling, a boy named Jen. As the the leader of the Mystics lay dying, he tells Jen to find a beinging named Aughra who has the missing crystal Shard. As the Mystic leader dies, the Skeksis leader also dies. There is a power struggle among the other Skeksis. Two try to became the emperor, the Genreal wins and the Chamberlin is exile. It is then they learn about Jen and they send the Garthim, crab-like creature to get him.

Jen makes it Aughra’s, who tells him that the Dark Crystal must be healed by but the time the three suns come together, an event called The Great Conjunction which is happing very soon. Aughra gives him some crystal shards telling Jen she doesn’t know which one is the Dark Crystal. Jen figures it out as it resonates with the tune the Mystic sing, but then the Garthim attacks and destroys Aughra’s home and Jen escapes.

Jen then meets another Gelfling, a girl named Kira and her pet named Fizzgig. Kira can communicate with all number of animals. Kira takes Jen to her village where she lives with the Podling after the death of her mother. The Garthim attack again and takes many of the Podlings as the Podling are used as slaves for the Skeksis after their life essences in drained away. Jen and Kira only escape the raid as the Skeksis chamberlain saves them.

Jen and Kira find an Gelfling temple of sorts and learn about the prophesy that only a Gelfling can heal the Dark Crystal. The Chamberlain turns up and begs the Gelfling to go to the Skeksis castle so that there can be peace but Jen and Kira reject him and travel to castle on their own. The Mystics also start making their way toward the Skeksis Castle.

As Jen and Kira approach the castle the intercept the Podling Hostages and free them. They flee the Garthim due to Kira’s wings, which only female Gelflings have. They enter the castle through a subterranean window but Kira is captured by the Chamberlain. The Skeksis plan to drain her of her life essences as it will make the new Emperor young again. As Kira is being drained, Jen telepathically tells her to fight and Aughra, who is imprisoned in the same room with a host of animals tells Kira to call the animals. Kira does and she escapes and one one the Skeksis is killed when he is thrown into the Lava pit that houses the Dark Crystal and when the Skeksis dies a Mystic dies too.

As the Great Conjuncture starts the Skeksis gather in the hall of the Dark Crystal. Jen magnes to get on top of the Crystal but drops the shard. Kira picks it up and throws it to Jen and one of the Skeksis stabs her and Fizzgig is thrown into the shaft of the Dark Crystal. As Jen heals the Crystal the Mystic enter the hall and they merged into the Skeksis to reveal a new race that thousand years ago shattered the Crystal with their ignorance. They bring back Kira to life and even Fizzgig is fine as Aughra saved him. Yay.

Kira holding the Crystal Shard The Dark Crystal picture image

Kira holding the Crystal Shard

In a perfect world, movies wouldn’t have to choose between style over substance. They two would work together to create a movie. Now a lot of movie do this but typically there a clear winner of intention, one wins over the over.

With the The Dark Crystal it would seem that the style of the puppets and the world that was created for the movie won over the substance but the substance and the style work more together to form this movie’s look and feel. The substance of the story and characters are made simple to give the style more room. If the movie had complicated the narrative it wouldn’t have allowed the world and the style to move as freely in the narrative. This was the issue with Oz the Great and powerful. Remember when the movie spent a good few minutes on the River of CGs but rushes Theodora’s evil transformation? That is what I mean, The Dark Crystal doesn’t rush the simple yet complex narrative yet still allows the the weird world to come through.

Weaver Mystic The Dark Crystal picture image

Weaver Mystic

So how is the story simple yet complicated? The story is simply a chosen one(s) that has to save the world, basically a hero’s journey. You don’t get much more simple than that. What makes it complicated is that technically one could save that because there are two Gelflings that either Kira or Jen could have done and the two work together like a couplet, more of them later. The is also the whole balance of good and evil and how one needs the other for balance. The Skeksis are evil and horrible but the Mystic are descried as living in a illusion of peace. One can be either wholly good or pure evil, there is a balance. That is some complex thoughts for a children’s movie.

Kira, Jen and Fizzgig The Dark Crystal picture image

Kira, Jen and Fizzgig

The characters are all really interesting, even boring Jen is fairly compelling. Jen doesn’t want to be a hero, he was asked to heal the crystal but he doesn’t whine that much. He is sheltered and somewhat naive which is a contrast to Kira who is more worldly. She knows how to speak to animals. She is the take charge one. Jen and Kira have a good balance between them, they need each other and it’s a good partnership.

The other character aren’t as develop. I wish there was more back ground on Aughra because she cool. Fizzgig is fun too has he looks like a sweet little puppy-ish thing but he has a big scary mouth. The Chamberlain is the most intresting of Skeksis as he is a schemer. He tries to trick Jen and Kira with peace to bring them to castle so he can get back in with Skeksis and when that fails he just kidnaps Kira. The other Skeksis have personalities but they are never made super clear outside their looks and moments.

Kira on a Landstrider The Dark Crystal picture image

Kira on a Landstrider

Now we have come to it, the technicals. This movie was created to be a puppet movie. Would it have been nearly as cool if it was a Live action movie or an animated movie?Maybe. The 80’s were ripe with weird live action movie, so it hard to say. But the puppets and the sheer other-worldliness they create is just so wonder to watch. The design by Brain Froud are wonder, with the dragon/vulture Skeksis and the dog/dinosaurs Mystic. Everything is so cool to look at. I also love the part where Jen walks into Aughra’s home and he sees that machine of the planets, so cool. And the Landstriders, aww those poor Landstriders.

Aughra The Dark Crystal picture image

Aughra

So let say you’re watching The Dark Crystal you make notice that the movie is dark and scary. One of thoughts about 80’s children movies is that it’s ok to scare children as long as there is a happy ending. So they can freak kids out with creepy Skeksis, throwing Fizzgig into a Lave pit and stabbing Kira as long as they show that Fizzgig is ok and the merged Skeksis and Mystic beings called UrSheks revive Kira.

Fizzgig The Dark Crystal picture image

Fizzgig

The Dark Crystal is a masterpiece of the puppet artistry in a movie form. There isn’t like anything like it, a serious and somewhat dark puppet movie.

For more – The World of the Dark Crystal: The Collector’s Edition

New Clues, clue 1 and clue 2

Esmeralda singing God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda singing God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

As mentioned before  Hunchback versions seldom ever passes The Bechdel Test, including the Disney version read here.  But it made me think about the other Disney movies. I was going to go through and look at each movie but I  don’t have to because this site  did all the work for me, http://disney-blog.com/2011/05/the-bechdel-test-and-disney-films/. But I’m going to offer some analysis.

Disney Princess Line UP with Esmeralda, Megara and Kida, picture image

Disney Princess Line UP with Esmeralda, Megara and Kida

As a refresher, to pass the test a work needs to meet 3 criteria; 1) It has to have at least two named female characters, 2) That talk to each other 3) About something other than a male.  Most movies fail the Bechdel test. Also passing or failing does not indicate the quality of a movie. Terrible movie pass and great movies fail.

Aurora and Prince Phillip Sleeping Beauty picture image

Aurora and Prince Phillip Sleeping Beauty

So what does this mean for Disney?  Well the purpose of the test is show the  female presence in a given movie.  Interestingly enough the older movies, Snow White, Cinderella, and Sleeping Beauty all pass. Which is valid as at least with Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty  there is a decent amount of named female characters. Though movies that don’t have lots of female characters still pass, like 101 Dalmatians, Peter Pan, Hercules, and even The Emperor’s New Groove, which is a male buddy comedy.

Jasmine Aladdin picture image

Jasmine

Movies like Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty are often criticized for passive lead female characters but the most of the characters in the movies are females. So having one strong likable female character doesn’t help the over-all female presence. Like Aladdin fails, hard.

Ariel's Fin The Little Mermaid picture image

Ariel

I would disagree with The Little Mermaid failing as the site says because Ariel and Ursula had a fairly long conversation about a few topics, I would give it a pass.  The Lion King could have passed if Nala and Sarabi had spoken more. I’m a little unsure if Snow White should have gotten the pass, as the Queen has a name but after the fact. Her name isn’t said in the movie. Though to be fair, I haven’t seen Snow White in a very long time.

Elsa and Anna frozen picture image

Elsa and Anna

I do find it interesting that with modern day Disney movies that are Princess that try to aim with boys in mind they do keep a strong female presence. Tiana with her mother, Rapunzel with her “mother” and the sisters of Frozen.

Yzma The Emperor's New Groove picture image

Yzma

I would  thought more Disney movies would have failed but it pretty mixed. It’s just really interesting that the older princess movies have a stronger female presence than the Disney movies that have a single “strong” and “Independent”  female character.

Esmeralda and Quasimodo in Notre Dame Ma Maison c'est ta maison garou helene Segara Notre Dame de Paris picture image

Esmeralda and Quasimodo in Notre Dame

Despite its flaws Notre Dame de Paris is the one of the best adaptions of the novel. It captures the spirt of Hugo and the characters better than any other version to date. Is it perfect? No but you don’t get much closer to the book and it does it own thing very nicely. And it brought musicals back to France.

Notre Dame de Paris Belle Esmeralda Helen Segara, Garou Quaismodo, Frollo Daniel Lavoie Phoebus Patrick fiori picture image

Belle with Garou, Daniel Lavoie, Patrick Fiori and Helene Segara

Easily this my favorite version. To be honest, I could spend more time on Notre Dame de Paris since I didn’t really get into the any of the other casts. In fact that is something I have always wanted to do even before thehunchblog officially started. I more than likely will return to Notre Dame de Paris and discuss the various casts more probably on Wednesdays at various interval, since Wednesdays are like a free-for-all day. Heck, there is a new Italian tour going on so there are a lot of casts to get through and I would like to discuss more about the costumes.

Garou as Quasimodo & Helene Segara Danse mon Esmeralda,Notre Dame de Paris picture image

Garou as Quasimodo and Helene Segara performing Danse mon Esmeralda

So this isn’t good-bye but a see you later Notre Dame de Paris.

Next month is a theme month (Guess the theme if you dare), so there won’t be a version starting in October. Next version starts in November and trust me when I say it’s one of the infamous bad ones.

Demi Moore image picture

Demi Moore

Demi Moore voice Esmeralda in the Disney version of The Hunchback of Notre Dame.

-Her first job was a bill collector.

-She “won” Worst Actress of 1997 for her performances in the films The Juror (1996) and Striptease (1996), then again the next year she “won” Worst Actress for her role in G.I. Jane (1997). She has been nominated six times. Though could technically be seven as in 1996 she got a nomination for two movies. And also in 1996, Disney’s Hunchback came out,which poked fun at her being in Striptease.

-Hired three cameramen to videotape the birth of her first child.

Disney Esmeralda Hunchback of Notre Dame Dance picture image

Esmeralda’s Dance Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

Bonus round- In the commentary of Disney’s Hunchback the directors  said they wanted Esmeralda to sound like “she’s been around” which is why Moore was cast.

Oz The Great and Powerful picture image

Oz The Great and Powerful

Basically one day, some Disney executive smoked a joint and thought “let’s have a prequel to The Wizard of Oz” but someone told them there was already a prequel floating around called Wicked. But the executive ignored that story and decided to throw money at pretty obvious prequel story based on the Wizard’s origins without the aid of the original source material by L.Frank Baum. And the result was Oz The Great and Powerful.

If I sound like I dislike this movie, I really didn’t hate it, I mean I didn’t like it either. It does something nicely but it has a lot of flaws and the story is just typical.

James Franco as Oz and Michelle Williams as Glinda Oz The Great and Powerful picture image

James Franco as Oz and Michelle Williams as Glinda

Oz is side-show magician who is also a con-man womanizer. He wants to be a great man like Tesla Ruining, Elephant killing, reason for L.A,  Thomas Edison. One day he gets in trouble with an audience and a strongman and he escapes in hot air balloon and get sucks into tornado and lands in the whimsical land of OZ. He meets a pretty lady named Theodaora the good, a witch. She tells Oz that he is the wizard of prophesy who save the land and rule OZ. Then they get attacked by the wicked witch’s minion. As they make their way to the Emerald City, Oz flirts with Theodora and she being an innocent naive lady believes him and thinks he is going to marry her. He also meets a flying monkey named Finley who becomes Oz’s servant

At the Emerald City Oz meets Theodora’s sister, Evanora. Evanora tells Oz he needs to kill the wicked witch before he can become king. So he leaves with Finley but doesn’t tell Theodora. Evanora then starts manipulating Theodora against Oz.

On their way to a dark forest they see that city that was attacked by the Wicked Witch and they meet a China Girl. Oz fixes her broken legs and joins the party. They sees the wicked witch but she is actually Glinda the Good Witch of the North and the daughter of the original king of OZ who got murdered. Evanora is revealed the real wicked witch. Theodora then gets mad at Oz for being with Glinda, Evanora gives Theodora an apple to remove her heart and as result Theodora’s skin changes to green and she is wicked. Evanora then attacks Oz and crew. They escape with Glinda’s bubbles and they go to Munchkin land.

Oz and crew plan an attack using Oz’s skills of illusion and misdirection. They win and Theodora leaves and Glinda beats Evanora who is actually an ugly hag. Oz then rules OZ as the Wizard of OZ. The end.

The China Girl Oz The Great and Powerful picture image

The China Girl

With Oz The Great and Powerful we have three movies within the same universe that are VASTLY different in tones and style. The original 1939 movie is fun and light-hearted while the sequel Return to Oz is classic 80’s dark children faire. Oz The Great and Powerful is sort of in middle of those tones but it’s very unapologetic in its modern sense of story telling.

Like the main character who wants more from life and to be the very best like no-one ever was. There is also a prophecy about the chosen one. More than that, the movie reveals in the 3D theatre experience where it just take it’s time for the pretty CG stuff to sink in, which are fine on the whole. The China Girl was one of the best CGs I have seen in a long time. The shine and shadows on her were wonderful. She was also the only character with any sense of pathos.

Also speaking of the other movies. The 1939 movie made it clear that OZ was a dream and Return To Oz was the nightmare though it was a little more vague in Reurn to Oz. However is straight up Oz subtitle the Great and Powerful it’s not a dream, it’s real. Which makes it confusing when there  are characters in Kansas that are the basis for characters in the land of OZ  most notably Michelle Williams as Annie who is a former lover of Oz’s as well as Glinda.

Rachel Weisz as Evanora Oz The Great and Powerful picture image

Rachel Weisz as Evanora

Then we have the casting. The casting is very problematic in this movie. There is something about James Franco. I don’t know what it but I do not buy it. He seems to lack the charm and charisma that this character needs. However he is not this biggest casting mistake. That would be Mila Kunis as Theodora. Her naive innocence, which should have been core to the character was not believable but Kunis was better in that capacity than her as the Wicked Witch, which she did not pull off at all. It bordered on being silly but in a very boring way. Michelle Williams and Rachel Weisz were fine in their roles. Only the China Girl and the flying Money did the best and the were just voice acting.

Mila Kunis as Theodora Oz The Great and Powerful picture image

Mila Kunis as Theodora

This movie may seem like character driven movie but it exist more as a technical piece because once you start asking about characters and motivation there isn’t a lot there. The character that should have been interesting is Theodora but her “broken” was the most rushed and illogical turning point ever. She get a broken heart because Oz talks to Glinda, that is it. I mean yes, Evanora turned her against him but in a movie that allowed for few minutes of showing Oz travel down the river to rush a major moment was sloppy. Also the make-up for the wicked witch was beyond bad.  Theodora was wasted.

Bubble travel Oz The Great and Powerful picture image

Bubble travel

If your going to watch Oz The Great and Powerful watch it for some of the technicals, like the China Girl and some of the imagery. Don’t want it for an compelling story or interesting characters, you will not find it on this yellow or red brick road.

Since October is a theme month we going with Live-Action fairy tale-ish movies that in keep with said theme, more or less, so  Clue 1 and Clue 2

Lon Chaney as Quasimodo 1923 Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Lon Chaney as Quasimodo 1923 Hunchback of Notre Dame

Short answer, yes! As of now there have been two Hunchback movies that seemingly have never got their footing one being from Max Ryan that had a full cast list and the other was from Josh Brolin who just had the director attached. The real question is why should they make a new version?

Salma Hayek as Esmeralda & Mandy Patinkin as Quasimodo, 1997 The Hunchback picture image

Salma Hayek as Esmeralda & Mandy Patinkin as Quasimodo,

Hollywood technically hasn’t made a Hunchback movie since 1939. Disney of course made their version 1996, but Disney is a little separate from Hollywood. The other versions were from France, (1956, and 1999) and the other versions were TV movies (1977, 1982, and 1997.) So there has not been a designated Hollywood Hunchback in  nearly 80 years.

Quasimodo (Charles Laughton) alone at the end 1939 Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Quasimodo Charles Laughton, 1939 Hunchback of Notre Dame

So yeah there should a new adaptation for a more modern audience. But more than that, there are more reasons than just timeframe.  Pending on the type of the movie that the producers go for, Hunchback could be pure oscar bait. For instant it’s historical-based story with a high  pretension factor. Second make-up, one can get crazy with the Quasimodo’s make-up and people love the trope of the ugly dude with the beautiful soul and I think people on the internet eat that shit up. There also the real-life angle they could make with the Hunchback worker. Oscars LOVE movies based on true stories.

Esmeralda (Gina Lollobrigida) dances, 1956 Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda (Gina Lollobrigida) dances, 1956 Hunchback of Notre Dame

Also adding to the oscar bait factor, the academy loves itself and since it made up of mostly of actors they like movies about actors. Now there isn’t actors so much in Hunchback but Gringoire is a playwright and Esmeralda is a dancer so they are technically part of the larger industry.

Sets of the 1982 Version of The Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Sets of the 1982 Version of The Hunchback of Notre Dame

They could also go other genre routes, like re-working the story to be like a super-hero movie. Super-hero movies are super popular though they have been waning in recent years. But Quasimodo fits a super-hero type, so it could work.

Esmeralda, Phoebus and Quaismodo Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda, Phoebus and Quaismodo Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

There is also the chance, albeit not a super strong one, of Disney doing a live-action adaptation of the Disney version.  This seems to a major trend with Disney right now.  I could see this happening more than an super-hero version or a pure oscar bait.

Josh Brolin Interview for Men in Black picture image

Josh Brolin Interview for Men in Black

I will say that I have no idea what Brolin version was trying to do but I would say given Brolin and the director it might have been a super-hero variety.  I couldn’t even guess on Max Ryan’s version.

But yeah, Hollywood make a new version. What kind of Hunchback version would you like to see?

(Post Script – Max’s Ryan’s movie is a going ahead as well as an  Esmeralda movie in the works)

 

Bruno Pelletier as Gringoire singing Fatalité Notre Dame de Paris picture image

Bruno Pelletier as Gringoire singing Fatalité

Before we concluded with the review proper of Notre Dame de Paris I want to discuss the editing on the original DVD. For the most part, the cuts and shots are serviceable. They showcase the musical by showing the the singers and stage in a a fairly balanced manner and it moves things along. In the practical capacity it does its job. However the editing at times tries to be artsy or at the least interesting with overlays.

Overlay of Phoebus Notre Dame de Paris picture image

Overlay of Phoebus

These overlays are dumb. Either the expressions are just bad like the overlay of Phoebus between Beau comme le Soleil and Dechire or they are not executed well has with the overlay of Gringoire at the end of Le Temps de Cathedral where it has a harsh line at the bottom that should have been softened. It’s also small and off to the side of the shot so it looks more silly than intentional. There are also these kind of overlay through Le Temps and the run time of the DVD. Florence has a lot of these type of overlays too.

Overlay of Gringore Notre Dame de Paris picture image

Overlay of Gringoire

Then we have the subtitles. The are not that great on the translation end of things. There are a lot of youtube comments just about how the subtitles are wrong and typically they blame the person who uploaded the video. No, the official subtitles on the DVD are bad.

However subtitles are hard thing to get right, one has to get the idea of words in a short time and make it quick to read. It’s more of a art form than a science. If you don’t speak French they are fine so for most people it’s not a big issue and if you do speak decent French you need the subtitles. So it’s just a youtube thing but really you need not waste your time complaining on about the subtitles, complain about the overlays.