The Prince of Egypt Picture image

The Prince of Egypt

The Prince of Egypt is a 1998 animated film based on the bible story of Moses and Exodus and the 1965 movie The Ten Commandments. It was one of Dreamsworks’ first movies and did fairly well at the Box-office. But the real question we have to ask is this a bad movie or is just ok? It’s great, shut-up.

Moses and Ramses The Prince of Egypt Picture image

Moses and Ramses

Ok the plot, So Ancient Egypt total sucks in you’re a Jewish slave under Seti I. This go shit to crap when Seti decides to killing the Jews babies. One mother decides to send her baby boy adrift in a basket on the Nile and he is delivered to the Queen of Egypt who adopts him and calls him Moses.

Years later Moses has grown into a care-free trouble making type and is best pals with big bro Ramses II. The toy cause some shenanigans and get in trouble with their dad and he says one weak link can ruin a dynasty, these words haunt Ramses. I just want to point out this Egyptian Dynasty isn’t that old, like Seti is the second Pharaoh of the 19th so yeah. Anyway Moses ask Seti to give Ramses a chance to prove himself and later that night at banquet. Ramses is named Prince Regent. The priests also offer him a capture woman from Midian. She is bit to wild for Ramses so he gives her to Moses.

When Moses sees her escaping her sort of helps by distracting the palace guards and follows her. He then runs into two salves, Miriam and Aaron who are his siblings. Miriam knows this because she followed the basket to the Queen. She sings the lullaby their mother sang to baby Moses and the stirs something within him. He confronts his mother and father and learns that Seti ordered infanticide because he fear their numbers. The nest day Moses accidently kills a Slave driver when he was over whipping an old man. Moses runs off despites plesa from Ramses.
Moses then runs into the Midian lady he helped and her people. He because a shepherd and falls in love with and marries the Midian lady who is named Tzipporah. Life is peaceful for Moses but then he runs into a burning brush which is God. God tells Moses that he needs to get the Jews freed from stinky-pants Pharaoh and God give Moses‘ stick special powers do his wonders.

Moses tells Tzipporah who is shocked but decides to go with him. Moses returns to Egypt and though delighted to see his brother who is now the Pharaoh is also now his adversary. Moses tries to convince Ramses to let his people go but Ramses refuses and the Jewish people don’t warm up to Moses either. Moses uses performs God’s wonder only to have the Priest use pallor trick to undermine him. Then the plaque come and Ramses still says no. Moses tries to warn him that something worse is coming but Ramses remains stubborn claiming he will not be the weak one and threaten Moses with infanticide of the Jewish people. Then the Egyptian first borns are taken including Ramses’ son. Ramses gives in and releases them.

The Jewish people are free and they walk and ended at the Red Sea. Ramses then shows up with his army. God sends a fire tornado to stall them (fill that sucker with sharks and think you have the plot to the next Sharknado movie). Moses then splits the Red Sea and the Jewish people get cross while the Egyptian (guess that awesome firenado did last) aren’t so lucky though Ramses lived, though historical dude lived to be like 90. The movie ends with Moses and the ten commandments.

Moses and the burning brushThe Prince of Egypt Picture image

Moses and the burning brush

Former Disney chairmen, Jeffrey Katzenberg had always wanted to make an animated version of The Ten Commandments but Micheal Eisner refused the idea. So when Katzenberg formed Dreamworks pictures with Steven Spielberg and David Geffan they went for it. Unlike some of the other Knock-off Disney movies, this one doesn’t use the sweet, sweet Disney formula, instead it opts to use the basic indigents that make Disney movies great; great stylish animation, sweeping music with great characters.

Moses and RamsesThe Prince of Egypt Picture image

Moses and Ramses

One of the best parts of this movie is the dynamic between Moses and Ramses. Their relationship is genuine but they also have to honor their adult reasonability that puts them at odd with each other. This makes for some great drama and in a lot of way this story and relationship is more mature than most straight up movie aimed at adults.

The down side is that that the rest of the characters are not that interesting and don’t have much personality to them. Miriam sort of does as she is hopeful but that that much considering Ramses and Moses. The comic relief priest are a little annoying but they don’t get that much screen time so it’s not that bad.

Tzipporah, The Prince of Egypt picture image

Tzipporah,

Then we have are vague princess-like character Tzipporah. She is the daughter of teh high Priest of Midian and is very similar to Esmeralda is character type. She feisy and mature, heck she is voice Michelle Pfeiffer who was akin to Demi Moore in the 90s. The trouble is Tzipporah don’t do all that much but considering that her personality does come though very well.

A Lovely Shot from The Prince of Egypt , picture image

A Lovely Shot from The Prince of Egypt

The really stand out in this movie is the animation and the visuals. I will just say that I’m not in love with the square angularness of the characters design but it’s a style and I can appreciate that especially when the other visuals and very cinematic looking shots and angles are truly beautiful. This movie has real scope to it and it one of the best looking animated movies with out a doubt.

I personally love the shot of both Ramses and Set in profile against the statues. I love that right before the passover scene Ramses, his son and Moses are mirroring the image on the wall depicting the death of Jewish babies, with son between the crocodile foreshadowing his death. My favorite image from the film though is the whale in the Red Sea as they cross it, that just makes me want to cry big sappy happy tears . Speaking of the Red Sea scene, I love the atmosphere as the depend down in the sea and the sound of the sea and the darkness is just wonderful.

The music is also great. I really love the background music especially the lullaby leitmotif and the burning brush music. The songs are good, I don’t love them but I don’t hate them. No song was that bad and they moved the story along. Some people question their existent in the film narrative but they didn’t bother me. I think they had more of lead in it would have been better.

Moses with Miriam and AaronThe Prince of Egypt Picture image

Moses with Miriam and Aaron

This this film perfect? No it’s not it has a bog flaw that hold it back, the running lenght. I feel this film could have stood to be longer. Moses learn about his origins with little to no breathing room between him seeing Tzipporah run off, his feeling bad over the Egptian children and his brother pain is cut too short because of the Exodus and When you believe. I think ten minutes would have help with the flow and maybe that would have fleshed out some the minor characters a little bit more.

Moses and the Jewish People leaving Egypt when you believe The Prince of Egypt Picture image

Moses and the Jewish People leaving Egypt

The Prince of Egypt is a very good movie despite any minor faults it has. It has real beauty and drama and you can just tell that the production team believed in this movie an delivered a great movie in return, see what I did there, because of the songs When you Believe and Deliver us?

Quasimodo doll wants to go new jersey hunchback notre dame picture image

Help The Hunchblog go see the Musical

So in honor of the blog’s 100oth, I have a few little announcements to make.

Announcement #1,

Since I don’t live super very away from New Jersey, I would like to try and go to the Hunchback Musical at the Papermills Playhouse in New Jersey. However since I’m primarily a blogger by trade I don’t have the funds to go on my own so I’m trying to crowd fund it.

If you would like to be a wonderful person and help me and the blog out to go to this musical, here is the link to donate, http://www.gofundme.com/h0h4z4     .

Anything you can give towards this is very much appreciated.

Announcement #2,

November is Nation Novel Writing Month (http://nanowrimo.org) and I’m trying participating. I’m writing a novel based on what I know which is me and blogging and ripping part Disney movies. Basically I’m parodying myself, the blog and online reviewing and I’m having such fun doing it.

I’m hoping publish it at some point. Also speaking of Hunchblog related book I’m planning on writing one using blog posts from the 1939 version and greatly expanding on it in a much more in-depth way.

Announcement #3,

This isn’t quite a formal announcement but I’m considering signing up for Patreon for the blog which offer special content to patrons but I’m a little apprehend about it.   It takes a lot for to sign up for things like that. Gofundme took some effort to go for. I

Thank you guys so much for your support and interested in the blog, I really appreciate it. And I hope for another 1000 posts and thehunchblog’s birthday is in another month so that is exciting.

 

Frollo 1986 Hunchback Notre Dame picture image

Frollo

While I have bashed the 1986 version of the Hunchback of Notre Dame, calling it a lazy, uninspired mess with cheap knock-off characters set in tones of soul-crushing dullness, I didn’t hate it.

Esmeralda and Gringoire 1986 the Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda and Gringoire

At best it’s watchable which is more than I can say for the Dingo version or the Enchanted tales version which one can only watch because they are so bad you can’t look away. The 1986 version isn’t so bad it’s good it’s just meh. Which considering the amount of laziness half-ass workmanship that went into this version, meh is high praise.

Next Version- Unknown

Djali Hunchback of Notre Dame Disney

Djali

Here is a very simple question for everyone, What is your favorite from the novel of The Hunchback of Notre Dame?

Frollo confesses his feelings to Esmeralda Sir Cedric Hardwicke, Maureen O'Hara 1939 Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Frollo confesses his feelings to Esmeralda, Sir Cedric Hardwicke, Maureen O’Hara, 1939 Hunchback of Notre Dame

My favorite scene from the novel would have to be the jail where Frollo confesses to Esmeralda but I also like a lot the silly Gringoire scenes, like Esmeralda’s and  wedding night.

 

Quest For Camelot picture image

Quest For Camelot

Quest For Camelot is a strange movie to put it lightly. It was made by Warner Bros and released on May 15th, 1998. Despite its release date it was actually finished in 1997 and was originally set for a holiday release but was pushed it back to avoid competition with Anastasia , Flubber, Alien Resurrection, Titanic and a re-release of The Little Mermaid. Considering these movies and Quest for Camelot’s rather disharmonious narrative, it was a good decision to push it back.

Ruber and Kayley Quest For Camelot picture image

Ruber and Kayley

The story starts with a young girl named Kayley, oh that name sounds soo Arthurian, is hanging out with her dad who is a knight of the Round of Table. Her dad has to go to Camelot for a knight’s meeting and young Kayley dreams of being a knight. KNIGHT!

During the Knight’s of the Round Table meeting one Knights named Rhubarb, I’m sorry, Ruber, not sure which is more ridiculous, wants more land because he wants more and King Arthur says that Knights get land equal to their needs. So Ruber being the sensible bloke that he is tries to kill the king so he and rule. Kayley’s dad is killed defending Arthur. When they bring the body home, Arthur offer Kayley’s mother, Lady Julianna entry into Camelot when ever she wants. I have to wonder if that a special or something offered to all Knight’s widows?

Ten Years past and Kayley wants more out of life than farm labor. But what this? Something more comes when Ruber comes a-knocking and demands Lady Julianna to use her open invitation to Camelot so Ruber can take over. In addition to this he uses a potion that some witches from the Acme Corp (not really joking here) gave him to meld animals and weapons together. His grand plan is fuse himself with Excalibur but as his Griffian was stealing it he dropped in the Forbidden Forest. Kayley gets away because Ruber’s minions massive dum-dums and just let her go. Kayley then makes her way to the Forbidden Forest to get the sword instead of warning Camelot because she wants to be a knight.

As she flees, Kayley is pursued by two goons and a talking chicken who was fused with ax, who wrotes this? Kayley seems cornered but is saved by a handsome blind hermit, named Garrett. She tells Garrett about the missing sword and he tells her that him and his falcon Aiden with go get it without her but  he agrees to let her come after she asks him a second time.

They head to dragon country where they run into a two-headed dragon that makes the gargoyles from Disney’s Hunchback look charming. They also run into Ruber and they escape some more stuff happens and Garrett and Kayley fall in love and they get the sword. As they arrive in Camelot Garret tells Kayley to go as he doesn’t belong in that world because of the blindness, I guess. Kayley then promptly gets kidnapped by Ruber and he fuses Excalibur to his hand. He attacks, Garrett comes back and Ruber is tricked into stabbing Excalibur back in the stone it came from and dies. Garrett and Kayley are knighted and they Riverdance, The End.

Kayley and Garrett Quest For Camelot picture image

Kayley and Garrett

Broken down into its most basic story elements, Quest for Camelot is about two people who society says shouldn’t be Knights wanting to become Knights and a Power hungry evil guy who wants power. Nothing in this movie is new or original, it just feel very much like a Disney knock-off but to fair this movie, it had a lot production issues.
First off, it is very loosely and I mean loosely based on a book by Vera Chapman called The King’s Damosel, which deals with forced marriage and rape. The narrative is lifted from the backstory of the main character when has to save her sister from the Red knight with help of a guy named Gareth. According to trivia, the movie was supposed to be darker intone but that got lost somewhere with the ax chicken and the two-headed pop-reference spewing dragons. It wasn’t a good move to to use this book. I mean to based your Arthurian movie off of a book that is based on Arthurian legend looks weird and bit incestuous. But they hardly used this book at all.

Second, the movie was created by executives who had no clue how animated movies worked. So the production on the movie suffered and the resulting movie while has decent production values, like decent animation, songs and voice acting, the story is clumsy and uninspired.

Garrett and Aidan Quest For Camelot picture image

Garrett and Aidan

The characters too run the gambit of alright to dullness to annoying. Really only one character is at all interesting and that would be Garrett, our blind hermit hero. Garrett got a back story where he was a stable boy who got lost his vision in a fire and Kayley’s perfect father trained him to be a Knight. Basically Garrett is the most interesting thing about this movie.

Ruber is just power-hunger and he does enjoy being evil but there something wanting about him. First, Ruber wants power but he also wants chaos. Hey Idiot, if there is chaos in the land that threatens your power pull. His plan in theory was good but the execution was dumb, there was just too many variables. For example Kayley escapes so what did he have to threaten Julianna with? She didn’t have to go along with it and could have sacrificed herself, her husband did. It just was just stupid but do you except from a guy who sends a talking axe-chicken to bring back a hostage.

Speaking of the Axe-Chicken, whose name is Bladebeak, him and the dragons, Devon and Cornwall are annoying, very annoying. There is no real reason for these characters to be in this movie other than making it fun for children. The pop culture references that the dragons make are more annoying than the gargoyles and just jarring. Yes, they all help in some way but that was justified their characters existing. If they hadn’t been in the film we would have lost nothing.

Kayley  Quest For Camelot picture image

Kayley

Then we have other sort of Princess-like character, Kayley. To Kayley’s credit she has a very clear goal, she wants to be a Knight. The problem is Kayley sucks at it. She gets into trouble and someone else has to save her. Even though she sort saves the day, she got the idea to stand her ground till the last second from Garrett.
But you know that really isn’t the problem with Kayley, she is just bland. I could take a character that thinks they are kick-ass but are not but she isn’t charming or interesting to watch. She also looks a lot like Belle, but F that, they shamelessly reference the Lion King for no reason so a Belle look alike isn’t a really issue here.

Kayley and Garrett Quest For Camelot picture image

Kayley and Garrett

Then we have the romance between Kayley and Garrett, it it so contrived. It just seems like it is in the movie because that is what Disney does. They went from snarky to lovey in like a day. I didn’t believe it nor was I invested in it.

Devon and Cornwall singing if i didn't have you  Quest For Camelot picture image

Devon and Cornwall singing if i didn’t have you

Then there is decent part of the movie the animation and like one-two songs. However both areas have issues. The animation for the most part is good but there is something about it that perplexes me though. It’s very fluid, so much so that its jarring in a way and yet it’s spare in compositions.

The songs are weak on the whole. Some are better than other like The Prayer but mostly they are just meh. Ruber’s villain song is a train wreck, it has no flow and zero harmony. The Dragon’s song is an annoying farce of a song that thinks its funny because of pop culture references. I don’t want a Arthurian-esque movie that references Sonny and Cher  and Elvis! No me gusta!

The trouble with these songs is that they come out of no where and when their done it like they didn’t happen. They add nothing. Also The Prayer song was misplaced as a heartfelt ballad during a chase scene and considering that is the song of the movie it’s off putting. There was another scene with Julianna later in the film that would have worked better. Also Garret’s singing voice while a decent singer did not work with Cary Elwes‘ voice.

Bladebeak Quest For Camelot picture image

Bladebeak

Despite my nitpicking on Quest For Camelot, I can see why people would like this movie, it’s a fun little adventure flick, it just wasn’t entertaining for me at all, in the slightest. Even the shear volume of celebrities couldn’t win me over and that sad considering I do enjoy some these actors.

 


Every time they said Excalibur, I thought this from Soul Eater.

La Jolla Hunchback Poster picture image

La Jolla Hunchback Poster

I have been looking for pictures or videos of the new Hunchback musicals since it began and I have found next to zip till now. While searching for the sets of show I found http://enseeseven.tumblr.com and when I looked back there a few days later I found this http://lajollahunchback.tumblr.com which has some of the recordings of the song from the show. So very briefly I will just go through the recording and give my thoughts.

Rhythm of the Tambourine –  I have to assume this is Esmeralda’s introductory song and it’s a new song. I gotta say though, it’s not doing much for me and I’m a little bummed that it not an Esmeralda only song that was a big issue for me with Glockner.

Made of Stone – I have to admit Michael Arden sounds a bit like Colm Wickinson here. I also wish he was angrier sounder, he sounds more sad but it’s a fine version of the song. I’m curious about the Ensemble/Gargoyles roles.

Finale Ultimo, Part 1 – They kept the stabbing angle? Neat! I don’t really like the pep talk with Quasimodo and the ensemble, seems un-necessary with the Made of Stone song. Overall it’s good.

The Tavern Song (Thai Mol Piyas) – Another new song! It’s fun. I’m not sure where this song goes in the play but I like it.
Apparently Thai Mol Piyas might mean “And wine we drink” in Romani.

Sanctuary (Reprise) – OMG, the red door scene! At first I thought it was the jail scene but it’s clearly not. This could have been in the original Glockner because it was in the King’s Academy version although less adult.   I’m glad to hear some lines from the book though.

God Help the Outcasts – They play this very straight to the original Disney movie which is fine by me because I hated Quasimodo part of the song as it took Esmeralda’s only solo away. At first I though Ciara Renee was going to be belt-y with this song but she isn’t, it’s nicely done.

The Bells of Notre Dame – This is very different. The example Frollo backstory prior to Quasimodo.  Frollo has Jehan back in the version. Frollo and Jehan lived at Notre Dame. Jehan gets Frollo a Gyspy prostitutes for his birthday but they get caught Jehan get kicked out. Frollo then rises to the ranked of Archdeacon. Frollo finds Jehan who dying and his Gyspy wife has died. Jehan asks Frollo to take his baby, i.e Quasi. He doesn’t want to but then does.

I’m not sure how to feel about this version of the song. It’s a good mitigation between the novel and Disney version but it lacks the drama and intensity that the Disney version had. However it could be way better on stage. They also mispronounce Jehan.

Hellfire – Much like God Help the Outcast, they play this one straight to the Disney version.

The got rid of A Guy like you, City under Siege, Out of Love, Dance of the Gypsies, Balancing Act.

What do you think of these songs?

Frollo 1986 Hunchback Notre Dame picture image

Frollo

From the Dingo version, to Jetlag, to the 1977 version and the 1986 version of the Hunchback of Notre Dame, accuracy to the novel and straight-up lazy execution go hand in hand. It’s insulting to the Hunchback story but it makes sense.

Quasimodo 1986 Hunchback Notre Dame picture image

Quasimodo

If the people in charged are not putting any effort in to the look and feel of the movie why should they put effort in the script? Adherence to the original content is not a bold move and not for the respect or love of the source material. It’s done because no one cares on the production and following the story closely is easier than thinking about a decent adaptation for a visual medium.

Esmeralda 1986 Hunchback Notre Dame picture image

1986 Esmeralda

It’s sad and insulting that some of the most faithful versions of Hunchback are lazy pieces of shit. This of course isn’t always the case (Notre Dame de Paris) but it’s par for the course you can either have a good movie that looks like the production team was trying but the story is messed up or a version where hardly an effort was made and it looks like crap but they followed the novel.

Gringoire 1986 Hunchback Notre Dame picture image

Gringoire

Is the 1986 version the worst and laziest version? No and no, while I don’t think the company did put much of an effort into the 1986 version the Dingo is far and away much lazier and Enchanted Tales and Secret of the Hunchback are most contestable versions. The 1986 has moments but it is lazy and adherence to the novel while it could be considered a plus in its favor, it is just part of the laziness memo.

Next Time – Conclusion

Frollo 1986 Hunchback Notre Dame picture image

Frollo

This was a list I originally made as a Squidoo lens but Squidoo is now defunct and it just didn’t seem like a page for Hubpages, not sure why though but I think it just better suited for the blog, so here we are.

Painting of Esmeralda and Djali by Wilhelm Marstrand

Painting of Esmeralda and Djali by Wilhelm Marstrand

Victor Hugo’s The Hunchback of Notre Dame (a.k.a Notre Dame de Paris) is known as a tragic tale of love, lust and tragic destiny. But despite the dark tones of the book, there are some very funny parts. This is a list of some of the funniest scenes in the book.
(in order how they occur in the book)
Please note, these scenes are funnier as written in the book and chapters may differ pending on translation.

Gringoire in the Court of Miracles by Celestin Francois Nanteuil  picture image

Gringoire in the Court of Miracles by Celestin Francois Nanteuil

Gringoire vs The Court of Miracles
Book 2 Chapter 6 “The Broken Pitcher”
Gringoire accidentally stumbles into the Court of Miracles and he is to be hanged because for trespassing. Gringiore tries to convinces them that as a poet he’d make a natural thief. They put him to a test which involves him standing an a ricky old stood with one foot, while trying to steal money from the “Bell Boy”; a dummy covered with bells. If he can steal the money without ringing a single bell he is in but he fails. In a last ditch effort Gringoire is offered to the women of the court for marriage. If he marries one of the women he’s safe. This deal suits Gringoire fine. The women berates him for being too poor and too thin. In the end Esmeralda takes pity on him and marries him to save him, which wounds Gringoire’s vanity.

Quasimodo at the Pillory. Illustration by L.H. de Rudder 1844 picture image

Quasimodo at the Pillory. Illustration by L.H. de Rudder 1844

Quasimodo’s Trial
Book 6 Chapter 1 “Ancient Magistracy”
Quasimodo is put on trial for kidnaping Esmeralda, distrubing the peace and resisting arrest. His judge is Master Florian Barbedienne, who like Quasimodo is also deaf. Master Florian doesn’t want people to catch on to this so he just pretends to hear people and passes judgement regardless. With Quasimodo he asks him a question and since Quasimodo can’t hear the question he just stand there while Master Florian pretends to have hear what he didn’t say.

Gringoire balancing a chair in this teeth 1844 picture image

Gringoire balancing a chair in this teeth 1844

Gringiore explaining himself
Book 7 Chapter 2 “Showing that a Priest and a Philosopher are Two Different Persons”
After Frollo sees Gringoire with Esmeralda, he starts questioning him on what he doing entertaining the crowd with balancing a chair in mouth and why he is hanging out with Esmeralda. He explains the wonders of his jaw and how it brings him money and that Esmeralda is wife in name only. Gringoire doesn’t despair that she doesn’t love him because Djali (the goat) likes him. Once again Frollo asks him if he has ever touch her and Gringoire asks he meant Djali the goat.

 Claude Frollo in his cell by Francois Joseph Aime de Lemud picture image

Claude Frollo in his cell by Francois Joseph Aime de Lemud

Jehan asking his brother for money
Book 7 Chapter 4 “Anarkh” and a bit from chapter 5 “The Two Men Dressed in Black”
In this chapter Frollo’s younger brother, Jehan comes to visit him. Jehan is a spoiled good-for-nothing mooch who only visits Frollo to get some money. Frollo is very disappoint that Jehan turn out so poorly so he disinclined to giving him money so Jehan has to turn on the charm. Jehan claims he needs money for charity, so that he and his friends whose names mean “Slaughter” and “the Rook” can buy a widow’s child clothes. When Frollo doesn’t buy his lie he say that he wants to go to a brothel. Jehan then ask for money for food and Frollo asks him about his studies which he really doesn’t brother with and Frollo repeats in Latin “He who will not work shall not eat”. Jehan ask for money for boots but Frollo says he will give him boot but no money. After a lecture about how Jehan on a path to the gallows Frollo hears someone coming and Frollo asks Jehan to hide in the stove and Jehan say his be quite for money which Frollo gives him. In the next chapter while Jehan is hiding he finds crusty bread and moldy cheese and eats them so loudly that Frollo claims it’s his cat to his visitor.

Lemud Illustration of Frollo picture image

Lemud Illustration of Frollo

Phoebus and the Goblin Monk
Book 7 Chapter 7 “The Spectre Monk”
Phoebus is about to meet Esmeralda when he runs in to a Spectre (some translation have it as “Goblin”), it’s really just Frollo but Phoebus is none to bright. Frollo calls Phoebus a liar when Phoebus says he is meeting Esmeralda. Phoebus doesn’t take kindly to being called a lair and challenges him to a dual. Frollo reminds Phoebus of his rendezvous and reassures him that he’ll kill some time soon but he really should keep his date. Phoebus wants to duel and go met with Esmeralda but eventually agrees with Frollo to postpone the duel. Phoebus then say he doesn’t have money, Frollo gives him the money on the condition that Phoebus hide him in the room, which Phoebus is more than okay with. Of course SPOLIER, in the next chapter Frollo stabs Phoebus.

Esmeralda & Phoebus Illustartion picture image

Esmeralda & Phoebus Illustartion

Phoebus wooing “Smeralda”
Book 7 Chapter 7 “The Advantage of Windows Overlooking the River”
This scene is where Phoebus and Esmeralda meet and Phoebus tries to put the moves on Esmeralda who is resistant. The scene ends with Frollo stabbing Phoebus and Esmeralda passing out. So the ending isn’t funny but Phoebus and Esmeralda’s banters is. Esmeralda is talking about marring Phoebus and he is tell her lies about how they don’t need to get married when they’re so in love but here the really funny part, Phoebus can’t remember her name. He keeps calling her “Smeralda” “Esmenarda” and “Similar” (may differ due translations). Her reaction to this is that she’ll change her name to whatever he prefers.

If you guys like this kind of post I can do more posts like this. Let me know.

Anastasia  picture image

Anastasia

Anastasia (1997) was one my favorite movies back in the day. It was made by our old pal Don Bluth and came out on November 14th 1997 under 20th Century Fox. In many ways this film is the definitive princess movie and people sometimes mistake it as Disney movie as it uses that sweet, sweet Disney formula and did well at box-off as well garnered two Academy Awards nominations for the music. But is the movie good or is it bad? It’s a little bit of both.

Dmitri, Anya and Vlad Anastasia  picture image

Dmitri, Anya and Vlad

PLOT! The film tells us that everything in 1916 Russia was just peachy (sure movie) that is till creepy-pants Rasputin gets fired from being best pals with Tsar Nicholas II and curses him and his family as he sold his soul because he is pissed off. The curse makes the “spark of unhappiness in Russia fan into a flame” that destroyed Imperial rule and ushered in communism. The movie doesn’t use that word and blames it all on Raspy. The night of the attack on the Romanovs, Anastasia goes back to her room with Grandmama Marie to get a music box and young boy gets them out a special exist. Rasputin tries to stop Anastasia but is killed when he falls through the ice. Anastasia and Marie then get separated and Anastasia gets Amnesia.

Ten years later, Marie is offering a lot of money for Anastasia’s return as the rumor goes she survived the February Revolution and gossip is the only thing to entertain the Russian because communism isn’t any fun…? Dmitri and Vlad are two conmen who plan on getting that money by hiring an actress to play Anastasia. Dmitri thinks he has an in as he has Anastasia’s music box, though he thinks it’s a jewelry box. As this is happening Anastasia is now called Anya and is getting released from an orphanage. Anya decides to go to Paris intend of going off to a job at some fish place as she has necklace that says “Together in Paris” and believes that is where her family is located. She first heads to St Petersburg along with her new puppy Pooka that she met on the road. She is told that to get to Paris she needs travel papers and she should speak to Dmitri at the Old Palace.

She goes to the Old Palace to meet him and has deju-vu moment. Dmitri, who isn’t having much luck hiring an actress thinks Anya could pass as Anastasia so he convinces her to join them. As she just wants to get to Paris, she agrees. Rasputin’s bat minion, Bartok is hanging out with source of Raspy’s power, a reliquary when he notices that the reliquary is stirring in Anya’s presence which convinces him that she is Anastasia and then the relic plunges Bartok into the underworld where Rasputin is in limbo because the curse failed.  Raspy the plans to kill Anya as he has the source of his with his power back.

Rasputin tries to axe Anya a few times on the journey and fails but he does cause a lot of collateral damage. While Raspy fails, Dmitri and Vlad transform into Anya into a proper lady and teach her how to prove she is Anastasia, via song montage.

The gang reaches Paris and the meets Sophie, Marie’s cousin and Vlad’s old flame. Sophie interviews Anya and she proves to Dmitri that she is really Anastasia as he was the one who helped Anastasia and Marie out of the Palace as a kid. This bums Dmitri out since he is in love with her after all the bickering they did. They go to ballet to have Anya meet with Marie, however Anya overhears Marie chewing out Dmitri as a conman and this whole thing was just about the money, so Anya slaps him and decides to peace out of Paris that night, at least she got her Paris fun song montage.

Dmitri then kidnaps Marie and takes her to Anya’s room and shows her the box. Anya’s memories re-surface with the power of smell and the music box, which her keepsake necklace opens and the two are reunited.

Dmitri is offers the reward but doesn’t accept and peaces out. Anya then forced into her showdown with Rasputin which results is a lot of damage to both a nice bridge and her princess gown, that bastard. But Dmitri comes back and helps Anya defeat him and Raspy bits the dust, literally. Anya and Dmitri then elope and Grandmama is cool with it.

Anya and Pooka against St Petersburg Anastasia  picture image

Anya and Pooka against St Petersburg

Let’s not mince word here, the reason why Anastasia is bad is because it takes a very bloody tumultuous period of history and fantasizes it. This movie is only accurate to people’s names and nothing else. To enjoy this movie you pretty much have to forget this is based on historical figures. Really they didn’t get anything right. It’s not like Romanovs or Rasputin haven’t been depicted in films before but the movie really makes light of the historical climatic of Russia. I mean it’s a sad when a disco song is more historical accurate about Rasputin (it’s a fun song though).

To the film’s somewhat credit, they know this was fantasy and in classic Disney fashion follows their clues from a classic movie, in this case the 1956 Anastasia
movie starting Yul Bynner and Ingrid Bergman. However reading stuff on the film from The Art of Anastasia, it says that they wanted a My Fair Lady type story where a girl is transformed from something ordinary to something glorious and apparently the world princess got kicked around a lot so this was the story they decided on.

Would it have been better to not include this period of Russian history and instead have a clearly fictitious story with clearly fictitious characters with a Russian setting? Hard to say because the Anastasia myth captured the world’s imagination for a long period time. It’s an impossible story to tell cleanly for kids but clearly the people who worked on the film loved it tried hard even if it is  grossly inaccurate. Should we pass it because it’s children movie? No, that shouldn’t reason pass off this kind of stuff. It’s historically inaccurate, it’s just fact.

Vald, Anya, Pooka and Dmitri Learn to do it Anastasia  picture image

Vald, Anya, Pooka and Dmitri

If you can for 90 minutes tell your purist part of your brain to shut-up, Anastasia is a good movie. It has great pacing, a solid script, lovely animation, some great songs and some memorable characters. Vlad is likable, Pooka is adorable, Dmitri while a snarky lair does get a decent arc, Bartok thinks Raspy’s plan is dumb and Marie is somewhat harsh but kind. You understand them and that is something you don’t often get in movies.

Rasputin though is weak. I know we turned off our purist brains but the real Rasputin was a really intriguing figure and this movie doesn’t even try to capture him except one part of his death, the ice.

Rasputin and Bartok Anastasia  picture image

Rasputin and Bartok

This Rasputin is pissed off for getting fired or something so he tries to kill the royals. I mean Nicholas shouldn’t have fired crazy but really that is his motivation for selling his soul to the Dark Forces? Side note, movie can’t say Communism or evil or demonic. They can say comrade and dark forces though, so lame.

Rasputin as the antagonist is both obvious and contrived. He always took the indirect methods to kill Anya. Once made the train go crazy and destroyed a bridge, second to sneak in her dreams and tried to get her to jump off a boat, and the third to drown her by destroying another bridge. Rasputin doesn’t like bridges apparently, but likes water. He could used his dark minions to stop her heart or something but he had to go for theatrics and cause infrastructure damage. If you want  to watch a movie about Rasputin either watch Agony (which is a communist propaganda movie and he is a gross figure) or if you find it, Rasputin: Dark Servant of Destiny, staring Alan Rickman.

Anya journey to the past  Anastasia  picture image

Anya

Anya/Anastasia is great character. She’s tough and no-nonsense but she is compassionate and fun. She knows exactly what she wants; family and a home so she can know her past so she understand herself.

This makes her follow Ariel in a way, as Ariel knew what she wanted; the people world. The other Disney Princesses (and most of the non-Disney Princesses, looking at you Yum-Yum) are more vague in their wants and desires. Anya, unlike the more classic Disney Princesses works at what she wants. She seeks out Dmitri for help but he needs her more than she needs him, she helps with getting out Raspy’s train plan and she kills Raspy, twice. Girl even fights in her princess gown. Anya is probably the closet to Mulan in activeness and Ariel is knowing what she really wants from life but she never feels like she it directly copying the Disney Princesses.

Anya and Dmitri being snarky train scene Anastasia  picture image

Anya and Dmitri being snarky

Anya and Dmtri’s romance is interesting. They spend enough time together to form an attraction that starts off as snarky but over time they come to respect each other. It is formulaic but enjoyable.

Anya singing Once Upon a December Anastasia picture image

Anya singing Once Upon a December

The animation is really good for the most part. The CG work looks dated and forced but hand-drawn stuff is lovely. They do repeat animation but you hardly notice.

The songs run the gambit from amazing to ok. Once upon a December is the best song in the movie. It’s beautiful and haunting. Journey to the past is a good I want song and did get an Academy Award nomination for Best Original Song. In the Dark of the Night is a cool enough song but the bugs should have been skeletons or demons or something cool and creepy and there is some silly lyrics. The rest of the songs are ok. No complaints on the music it’s solid. And like Thumbelina the music numbers are all theatrical which is fun and memorable.

Some fun little Trivia- Helene Segara of Notre Dame de Paris, sang a cover of Once upon a December for the French Soundtrack and I used play Once upon a December on the Piano, I had the sheet music, it was my jam in the day.

Anya and Pooka Anastasia  picture image

Anya and Pooka

Anastasia suffers for its gross historical white washing but otherwise it’s a good entertaining movie. Did I mention this movie has a fucking puppy in it? PUPPIES! And not one but THREE PRETTY DRESSES!