This made me giggle quite a lot.
Melody and Quasimodo
The Enchanted Tales version of The Hunchback of Notre Dame
Melody and a “handome” Quasimodo
I LOATHE this version.
Next Hunchback Version – The 1986 Australian Version… sigh…………. just sigh…..
The 1986 Australian Version of The Hunchback of Notre Dame
Book 7, Chapter 7, The Specter Monk
The Shadow Notre Dame de Paris 2011-2012 Asian Tour
I find this chapter silly and I think it’s meant to be so, people forget how silly this book can be because of the ending.
Basically Frollo, in creepy monk form falls Phoebus. After they exchange some words, Frollo calls Phoebus a liar about meeting Esmeralda, which gets a real bee in P-boy’s bonnet and he tires to challenge Frollo.
Frollo deals him by telling him for he is forgetting his date but poor Phoebus wants both the fight and the girl but darn he is out cash. Frollo gives him the money in exchange for letting him watch and he ensures Phoebus that one day he will slit Phoebus‘ throat. Phoebus seems unfazed by this and lets him in the room to watch.
You have to wonder what is going through Phoebus‘ head? I know he is over confident but really. Ah well, he is probably a but drunk from the previous chapter.
Book 7, Chapter 8, The Advantage of Windows Overlooking the River
Jean Danet as Phoebus & Gina Lollobrigida as Esmeralda,1956 Hunchback of Notre dame
In this chapter Phoebus brings Esmeralda to the fateful room where Frollo is watching. Phoebus is ready sex Esmeralda up but she is not really in to as she is innocent and wants to maintain her purity so she can find her parents. Phoebus is working his pick-up lines and love speeches into overtime which eventually wins over Esmeralda but then Phoebus gets stabby-stab by Mr. Frollo.
Pretty much till the end of this chapter where Esmeralda is arrested, this chapter plays out on the humorous side. Gotta love Phoebus‘ butchering Esmeralda names and poor dear naive Esmeralda tell him she’ll change it for him. I do think him calling her Similar is very silly. Then there is all Phoebus’ love lines and Miss Esmeralda falling for them. It’s a rather silly chapter.
Also the description of Frollo’s face as he stabs Phoebus always reminded me of the Grinch.
Quasimodo & Beach Time Antics by me
It’s a new eBook of Short Hunchback stories! This time it’s at the beach. I had hoped to get this done a lot sooner but my own summer-time antics got in way.
This eBook contains 5 short yet intersecting stories, in which Quasimodo buys a swimsuit, Esmeralda enters a beauty contest, Fleur-de-Lys is mad at Phoebus, Frollo is insane and Gringoire finds a new form of artist expression.
You can get right HERE. It costs $0.99 (because I got to eat) and payment is handled by Paypal.
Felix the Cat the Movie
Felix the Cat The Movie 
It’s just weird and turns sane minds to mush. Although, if I were to grade on a curve of all the non-Disney Princess movies I have subjected myself to so far, I would rather watch this one over Gulliver’s Travels or The Singing Princess. Not high praise but still.
Felix, Oriana, and Pim
Plot, because there is one. The Kingdom of Oriana is under attack by the Duke of Zill. The ruler of Oriana, Princess Oriana tries to escape by using the Dimensporter, a dimensional transporter, but she is caught by Zill’s evil robotic Cylinders that look like paint cans. As she is being dragged off she sheds a magic tear that goes through the Dimensporter and finds Felix the Cat.
Felix the Cat is a talking cat with a magic bag that can transform into anything. The rules and limits of the bag are never explain so just don’t think about. Felix follows the tear back through the Dimensporter and he sees a vision of Oriana as the tears fades away. Also I should note, Felix is being followed by two scientists who want his bag.
After dealing with some weird fish, Felix lands in the Land of Zill where he meets Pim, think wild west prospector. Pim double crosses Felix and takes him to Wack Lizardi’s circus. Wack is also a lackey of The Duke of Zill. Felix is then made an attraction at the circus because of the bag. Princess Oriana is also an attraction with her woeful bubble dance, she dances in a bubble.
Felix enlists the help of two lizard-mice, Mizzards to eat through the wall of his cell so he can talk to Oriana. Oriana tells him that the Duke of Zill is her uncle and he wants the Book of Ultimate power. Felix tells her that are going to escape together.
During the next performance, Felix convinces Wack to let him play the music while Oriana dances. He then creates a lot of bubbles and he, Oriana, Pim who is good now, and the Mizzards all escape.
As they flee towards the Kingdom of Oriana, Felix loses his bag but are they joined by the two scientists who found it and Felix gets it back and the scientists who are called the Professor and Poindexter, join the party. Then they go through the hair forest and they are attacked by head hunters or flying demons heads which are subdued by hats.
When they get to Oriana they are caught by Zill. Zill threatens everyone so Oriana surrenders the Book of Ultimate Power, which says the ultimate power is “Truth, Love, and Wisdom.” Unhappy, Zill unleashes the Master Cylinder on them but Felix defeats it by, I kid you not, by throwing the book at it. In the end Felix and the scientists go back home through the Dimenspoter.
Felix with the bag as scuba gear
This movie is very trippy and weird. I suppose it could have been more trippy and weird though. The trouble with it is we don’t have the sane character to walk us through the craziness. So it’s just crazy and more crazy. It should have been a fish out of water tale but Felix fits into this world too well. Everyone is weird. But then again we really don’t have characters as none of them have personalities.
Felix laughing at a skull
Felix is nice though he mean to the dead. All he really does that gives a shade of a personality is makes puns. That’s it. If you like puns this movie will kill that love. I’m not sure what Pim’s deal is. The scientists just want the bag and they also make puns. Zill wants power. 78 minutes and that’s all I can get out of the characters.
Princess Oriana dancing in the bubble
Then we have our token Princess, Oriana. She is only a Princess in name as she’s actually a Queen. But the term Queen is used for evil crones, so we have to call her Princess. I’m just going to roll my eyes.
Oriana is nice, slightly self-defacing and an idiot. Her country is attacked when she disbands the army even though she knew her Uncle wanted her Kingdom, or Queendom, but she’s Princess so I guess Oriana is Princessipality. Like the other characters there isn’t much to her.
Felix with Pim on a Cylinder
So this movie doesn’t have lasting memorable characters but how are technicals? Not very good. I mean there is a some weird animation but on the whole it’s not too great. However, where this movie really stinks is the sound mixing. The sound effects are a lot louder than the dialogue, which isn’t great either but would have been nice to hear.
Lizards of Zill singing Who is the Boss?
I will say that I didn’t hate one song. I kind of liked Who is the Boss, which is a song they sing at the circus about how great Zill is. It just so 80s I can’t help it. I mean it’s stupid but delightfully so.
Felix meet Oriana’s tear along with the bag in its normal state.
Felix the Cat the Movie is loud, trippy, weird and outright stupid. It’s not the worse movie in the world but it is quite, quite, quite, annoying.
3D head of Felix
Isn’t this the stuff of Nightmares?
La Jolla Hunchback Poster
The musical version of The Hunchback of Notre Dame is first to play at the La Jolla playhouse in San Diego on October 26 through December 7. You can get tickets for it now.
However after that starting on March 4th through April 5th the production goes to Paper Mill Playhouse in Millburn New Jersey. So east coast people can get a chance.
I hope they release the casting of the musical soon.
Melody with “Handsome” Quasimodo
I briefly touched on the moral of the Enchanted Tales version of The Hunchback of Notre Dame
Ok, the moral of this is “Looks don’t matter if people see you as pretty.” I’m not kidding, this the exchange between Melody and Quasimodo, this is the actual dialogue, this happened,
Melody: Are you alright? Oh, you look so handsome. You have beautiful eyes.
Quasimodo: Is that how you see me?
Melody: It is how you are.
Quaismoodo: Perhaps if you see me as handsome, than perhaps I am.
Melody: Mhmm.
Quasimodo: Just perhaps, my looks really don’t matter anymore.
Melody: They don’t matter.
Basically the moral, as this movie spells it out, is looks don’t matter if you’re considered pretty. That is so awful. You have to be pre-approval by an outside gaze to have a sense of self-worth and confidence. Because Quasimodo only told off Jean-Claude, his little brother, when he was handsome. Oh, I hates this movie.
Now this moral shouldn’t be the stuff of children videos since people have to deal with this in their everyday lives. Kind of depressing, if you think about.
Melody and a “handome” Quasimodo
However, I get what they were trying to do, really. What Enchanted Tales was trying to do is show that inner beauty makes one beautiful. It’s through Quasimodo’s inner strength that transforms him into a handsome guy, you know like the story they were really trying to tell cough*Beauty and the Beast*cough. However, this moral fails to be communicate because of the lazy sloppy writing. That inner beauty thing doesn’t register at all.
Quasimodo pretty much says, My looks don’t matter if you think I’m pretty. I really can’t believe someone approved that during the writing process.
Handsome Quasimodo a.k.a Wholemodo?
This moral is the stuff of satires, of parodies, of jokes not for a children’s movie. WORST MORAL EVER. Really, if were any worse it probably would be better.
At this point, if it wasn’t for the company who produced it, I would think this movie was a satire of the Hunchback, or at the very least of children movies in general, because that is the only way I can rationalize how this ass of version got made in the first place.
Pretty Quasimodo, gags
Next Time – Conclusion – I’m done!
One Confused Dingbat
Book 7, Chapter 4, Anakh
This chapter is a little important, as the word Anakh inscribed on a wall of Notre Dame is said to have inspired Frollo and the rest of book from there. The added word of impurity beneath was probably an add in.
Basically this chapter is Jehan wants money from Frollo. Frollo gives him some money and makes him hide in a stove while Frollo has a guest.
It’s kinda of silly little chapter as interactions with Jehan are mostly always humorous. This chapter also gave us the song Val de Amour from Notre Dame de Paris as that fine establishment is mention here. I’m going to go out on a limb and say it’s the only time it’s mention but I not sure.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GUQrt2i3mbQ
to spice up the post.
Book 7, Chapter 5, The Two Men Dressed in Black
In this chapter, while Jehan hides in the stove Frollo has his guest, Master Jacques, the King’s attorney. Jacques tells Frollo that court is ready to arrest Esmeralda but Frollo tells him to wait till his approval.
It’s then that Frollo sees a fly caught in a spider web. Frollo likens the fly to both him and Esmeralda. That they both were in search of the sun, though with Esmeralda the metaphor is more literal as she loves the sun and freedom whereas with Frollo it’s more metaphoric as sun is learning and eternal truth. He is also the spider too. Both the spider and fly are caught in the wed of fate and Frollo really likes this metaphor for him and Esmeralda.
I wished film versions would use this scene as it would be cool to see, but to my knowledge not a single version has done this scene. Then again, only two versions use the Anakh scene and that inspired the book.
Book 7, Chapter 6, The Effect Produced by Seven Oaths in the Public Square
This is a set-up chapter! This chapter tells us and Frollo, that Phoebus has a hot date with Esmeralda that very night. Not much happens here but you got to love that Jehan messes up her name as Smeralda. Though Phoebus called her Similar in a later chapter is sillier.
Castle in the Sky
Of all the Studio Ghibli movies without a doubt, Castle in the Sky
Like with Nausicaa, I watched this in Japanese with subtitles.
Pazu seeing Sheeta floating down from the sky
Castle in Sky tells the story of a girl named Sheeta who is being pursued by the army who is working with an ambitious government agent and Air-Pirates. They are all after her because her amulet which can lead them to a magical floating island, called Laputa, that hold not only great treasure by great power.
Sheeta meets and is aided by Pazu, a boy roughly Sheeta’s age who works for miners. Pazu also wants to find Laputa as his father saw it but was called a liar.
It is also reveled that Sheeta and the govenment agent, Muska, are descended from the Laputa’s royal family. Sheeta and Pazu have to stop Muska before he uses Laputa to take over the world.
Dola’s Pirates with their booty
This movie pretty much has something for every one; you have action, adventure, mysterious, humor, romance, pirates, airships, robots, yaks, you know everything you could ever want in a movie. It’s perfect!
Pazu and Sheeta seeing Laputa
When it comes down it, very subjectively, I like the dynamic of the two main characters’ relationship, you know, the princess and the poor boy love story. Aladdin 
And just for the record, I didn’t like The Notebook
Dola, the leader of the Air-pirates
Pazu is an honest, hardworking hero who is very genuine and resourceful. He is very devoted to Sheeta. The Pirates are a lot fun. Dola is awesome. Our villain, Muska is calm and elegant till he goes all power mad derstorying things because he just wants to take over the world as he think it’s befits his birthright. Clear motivations for the win.
Muska and Sheeta
Though I will admit he is a be of a creeper toward Sheeta. It’s sort of implied that he means to use her to carry on the Laputa royal family. The pirates are also little infatuated with her too but more innocently. Still, she’s like 12.
Sheeta
Speaking of Sheeta, our Princess in this semi-non-Disney Princess movie. Sheeta is sweet for the most part but she does knock out Muska out before she says anything, so she is active. She is also smart and resourceful.
Pazu and Sheeta seeing Laputa
Even if you don’t like great characters in your movies, though I don’t why you wouldn’t, the animation is stunning. The flying scenes are great. And the glowing rocks in the cave were breathing-taking. And the scenes when Pazu and Sheeta first arrive on Laputa are too pretty.
The music is also lovely, I love the ending song. It’s wonderful!
Pazu and Sheeta escape from the pirates on a train
Castle in the Sky is a classic adventure tale with a lot great characters, charm and beautiful animation. I really do love this movie but it’s harder to gush about a movie than it is ripping it a new one. Then again, it’s way easier and a lot more fun to a watch good movies, I could get used to reviewing good movies! What’s the next movie I have to review?
Felix the Cat
Cries……..