Djali Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Djali Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

 

Which Song from Disney’s Hunchback of Notre Dame are you?

Which one of the Laverne’s birds are you? Bet you didn’t know they had names!

Which one of the Gargoyles’ Drawings are you?

Which Bell of Notre Dame are you?

Are you Team Achilles or Team Snowball?

Are you a Quasimodo super fan?

Which creepy Hellfire judge are you?

Are you obsessed with Esmeralda as much as Frollo? The results are always No but there is a spectrum

Which one of Djali’s expressions are you?

Are you a bum, thief or strumpet?

 

 

Does anyone wish these quizzes  were real?

 

(disclaimer – this is a joke and Laverne’s birds do not have names nor do the creepy specter judges but the Bells do)

Simba 2019 The Lion King Remake picture image

Simba 2019 The Lion King Remake

Instead of being mad that this remake seems content to enjoy its false advertising or some how trying to redefine ‘what is live action’ let’s just  considered how this movie might incorporate the “live” aspect without anyone knowing so Disney can continues to capitalize on this trend.

Disclaimer – This post is meant as joke.

So stupid idea number, this movie DOES have “live action humans” in it. Like the story is actually a nature documentary and there are humans off in the background or foreground trying to get those iconic cinematic shots and making commentary, like the narration in the Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty remakes .

Also these humans can harp on those plot-holes that were in the original that people on the internet like to point out all the time. Like the logic of King’s impact on  the weather and ecology, Nala’s dad and the incest that it implies, though watch this remake  address that Nala’s mother was taken in from some other pride so there is  no incest. Don’t worry about it because Disney fixed it.  Other plot-holes may include the elephant graveyard, Simba surviving on bugs (though Film Theory covered that ) and so on and so on. Disney will fix it, it will fix them all and create new ones but that will be the remake  of the remake’s problem.

Or perhaps maybe one of the animals is a real Animal hidden amongst the CG animation.  You will have to watch the movie 100 times to spot it. And it will be in the background and it will like a tiny lizard or something. Maybe one of the bugs Simba eats. Likes it’s a Metaphor for how CG is taking over.  But only TRUE DIE HARD DISNEY fans will spot the “live” animal in this remake.      

The reasons for these remakes  existing, besides more money, does seem to be pushing the  computer animation tech (which people are bored with at this point) AND to correct plot-holes from the originals because imagination is hard and people need things explained more. Like with Beauty and the Beast and logic of a curse and a magical castle. So now they need it with CG Lions meet Hamlet.

I hope this movie does actually shoe-horn in humans or one real animal just for the word usage of “Disney Live Remakes” but I also can’t WAIT for how people in interviews will BS some reason for how it’s “Live”  or why it doesn’t matter.   Then again does Disney actually use the term “Live Action remakes?” Is this even a problem?

Ultimately I do not care, Disney needs its money and repackage nostalgia is a safe bet to get that money.   Though if people really wanted Disney  to stop with these movies collectively we need to stop paying attention and sending money on them but we won’t so here we are with four “live action remakes” coming out in 2019.

WHERE IS THE LIVE ACTION HUNCHBACK DISNEY??????

 

Alas there are no Hunchback of Notre Dame ugly Christmas sweater just yet but since this blog has a Disney leaning here are some Disney Ugly Christmas Sweaters that you can get right now via amazon.

Also I had wanted to showcase a Notre Dame Fighting Irish sweater just to be funny but I couldn’t find one. But there are a TON of Disney Ugly Christmas Sweaters, because of course there is, it’s Disney and Christmas.

Disney Villains Good Bad Ugly Christmas Sweater

Disney Villains Good Bad Ugly Christmas Sweater picture image

Disney Villains Good Bad Ugly Christmas Sweater

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Disney Snow White All Dwarfs Ugly Christmas Sweater Fleece

Disney Snow White Dwarfs Ugly Christmas Sweater picture image

Disney Snow White Dwarfs Ugly Christmas Sweater

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Disney Men’s Mickey Mouse Ugly Christmas Sweater

Disney Men's Mickey Mouse Ugly Christmas Sweater picture image

Disney Men’s Mickey Mouse Ugly Christmas Sweater

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Disney Frozen Olaf Sven Ugly Christmas Sweater Sweatshirt

Disney Frozen Olaf & Sven Ugly Christmas Sweater picture image

Disney Frozen Olaf & Sven Ugly Christmas Sweater

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Because I love Star Wars there are two but there are many, many…many more.

Star Wars Official X-Wing Vs. Tie Fighter Christmas Jumper/Ugly Sweater

Star Wars Official X-Wing Vs. Tie Fighter Christmas Sweater picture image

Star Wars Official X-Wing Vs. Tie Fighter Christmas Sweater

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Star Wars Men’s Darth Vader Holiday Sweater

Star Wars Men's Darth Vader Holiday Sweater picture image

Star Wars Men’s Darth Vader Holiday Sweater

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If I ever do make a Quasimodo/Hunchback Ugly Christmas sweater I will post here because where else would I put it? And it will be very ugly because I suck at art. Of course you can always get my Quasimodo Ornament at Zazzle  for your Christmas tress.

Happy Holidays!!!!!!

I have been wanting to these type of posts for a while. Basically it’s just fashions, mostly gowns, that look similar to an Esmeralda costume in someway.

Renato Balestra, Spring 2014 picture image

Renato Balestra, Spring 2014

 

This gown by  Renato Balestra from spring 2014, is akin to Disney Esmeralda’s costume in terms of its color story and verticality. I also like that it has a sari-like way about kind adding to appeal.

Naomi Scott picture image

Naomi Scott

Let’s just unpack this bit of casting news.  Recently Naomi Scott was cast as Princess Jasmine in the upcoming Live-Action Remake of Aladdin and some people are upset. Scott is half Indian and half British and Jasmine is Middle-Eastren which means for a lot of people that she isn’t White or Indian. The reason for her casting is that she can sing and dance. At least that is excuse given.

Karen David as Princess Jasmine in Once Upon A Time picture image

Karen David as Princess Jasmine in Once Upon A Time

It’s a hard one. Personally  I think Scott would have been better suited for Esmeralda, though I would rather see Gigi Radics in the role but this isn’t the first time Jasmine has played by a women of Indian Descent. In Once Upon a Time she was played by Karen David who can also sing and dance, watch Galavant, that show is awesome. One point people are making against Scott playing the role is that is was great chance by Disney to have a Middle Eastern woman in a prominent positive role. Another issue is that casting Scott looks like Disney doesn’t understand  that Middle Eastern culture  and Indian culture are different, even though some have defended Scott by saying there is overlap in the styling of Aladdin  like the palace look like the Taj Mahal and Raja’s name. Also at Disney World Aladdin character frequent the Moroccan pavilion at Epcot. Disney has aways mixed vaguely similar cultures.  I mean Agrabah  is a combination of Arga  and Baghdad, which is where Aladdin was originally supposed to be sets. Agra is an Indian city in Uttar Pradesh where the Taj Mahal is located.

Princess Jasmine, Aladdin picture Imade

Princess Jasmine

Oh, boy am I generalizing today but a lot people feel that everyone should play any role and some feel that if you whitewash you have  to cast everything like in voice acting in accordance with a character’s race and background and it just a can worms. First off Whitewashing is a BIG issue. If a character is a specific race and if it’s important to their character and setting than YES cast someone who fits the mold. I had no idea that years ago bitch about Chinese women playing Japanese women in Memoirs of a Geisha that should have been grateful they were at least East Asians. I did here people complaining about black people in the new Beauty and the Beast movie as historical inaccurate. Forget about the implications of a forgoten Prince hanging out after I guess the Revolution, it’s the race of few minor characters that irked some people.

Mena Massoud picture image

Mena Massoud

Disney is in a unique position with its remake movies, they don’t need bankable actors. Sure, they help but people are going to see these movies more for nostalgia than the actors.  So far with Aladdin, Aladdin is being played by Egyptian- Canadian actor Mena Massoud and Will Smith playing the Genie. If there reason for casting Scott was predicated on Singing and Dancing made they either rethink making these remake musicals or they could considering dubbing.

Naomi Scott picture image

Naomi Scott

I think if Disney had expanded their search or at least rethought the singing necessity there might have been a better Jasmine. Scott might do fine in the role but I can understand both side of the argument of her casting. It seemed like filmmakers gave up trying to cast the role and settled for some who nearly had the right ethnic background.

Or maybe the film will make Agrabah a reverse Mughal-equse regime where the ruling and noble class are of Indian descent and the lower class are Arabic to justify this casting choice. (This will more than likely not happen.)

http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2017/07/17/disney-aladdin-jasmine-naomi-scott_a_23034316/

http://fortune.com/2017/07/21/disney-aladdin-cast-naomi-scott/

Quaismodo Bells of Notre dame reprise Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Quaismodo Bells of Notre dame reprise Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

I get a Google-Alert for Hunchback of Notre Dame. However it sucks. Mostly it just tells me about another regional production of Hunchback, which is great or something on Criaglist.  To be honest I mostly ignore the alerts. Last Saturday though I got it in my head to just look on Google News for Hunchback when I saw this;

http://www.denofgeek.com/us/movies/the-hunchback-of-notre-dame/266641/the-hunchback-of-notre-dame-live-action-remake-considered-by-disney

OR a similar news outlet making this report.  Also I think my Google Alert alerted me to this on Monday.

So about the news. It’s  not yet happening so to speak but Alan Meken said

“I can’t say anything yet,” Menken said, “but I think Hunchback would make an amazing live action musical.”

Quasimodo during Out There Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Quasimodo during Out There Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

So it MIGHT happen. After watching the Beauty and the Beast  remake, I think Hunchback is the way for Disney. It really did seemed with the new Beauty and beast movie they were trying to captizle on a movie that studios already thought was near flawless which is why they only changed minor things and did a fairly straight shot for shot remake. What was the point of remaking it other than making money? They could have just re-released the 1991 movie to theater if there weren’t going to adapt the story for the medium more. Say what you want about the 2015 Cinderella movie, at least it was different from the cartoon. Which bring us back to Hunchback.

Disney never liked Hunchback that much. It didn’t make much money ergo it wasn’t successful for Disney. Also the darker tone was turn off for a lot of people. A live-action version could fix a lot of issues and people might be more forgiving of a dark tone. It would be interesting to see what is done with the story. Do they make it more of blend of the musical and the cartoon. Or do they follow the book more? Do we get a more innocent Esmeralda and angry Quasimodo? Do we get a priest/alchemist Frollo?  Do we get a Gringoire?

If this movie does get made it brings the total number of Hunchback movie adaptions in production up. Very technically speaking there are three in the works. There is the Max Ryan version (could be in filming hell), there was the version from Esmeralda’s perspective (haven’t heard any new on that one in a long time) and the Universal Monster version (hope The Mummy didn’t kill this being made.) Pretty sure the jazzy Brolin version is dead.

Anyway well we’ll just have to wait and see but I’m up for a new Hunchback version good to bad.

 

 

Ariel Disney The Little Mermaid picture image

Ariel Disney The Little Mermaid

There are 19 planned Disney Live action Movies planned so far and gotta say some are weird concepts. Here’s a list or you can watch the video here 

  • Mulan  
  • The Lion King
  • Dumbo
  • The Sword in the Stone
  • Prince Charming  (looks at the archtype)
  • Genie (Aladdin Prequel)
  • Aladdin
  • Cruella
  • Winnie the Pooh
  • Little Mermaid
  • Peter Pan
  • Tinker bell
  • James and the Giant Peach (rumored)
  • Pinocchio
  • The Jungle Book 2
  • Maleficent 2
  • Chernabog (humanizing the demon who controls the dead)
  • Snow White and the 7 Dwarfs
  • Rose Red ( about Snow White’s sister)
A Puppet of Quasimodo bells Disney Hunchback of notre dame picture image

A Puppet of Quasimodo during the Bells of Notre Dame Disney Hunchback of notre dame

These movies join the group of Live action Disney remakes, which is their new favorite trend as it’s easy to capitalize on. While there are more than a few titles missing from the list, Hunchback is missing. Am I surprised? Not really. Do I wish they were making a live action version of Hunchback? Hellfire yes!  Aside from the new musical, the landscape of Hunchback is barren. Got a little from the new Beauty and the Beast version but since then nothing.

Quasimodo singing "Out There" Hunchback of Notre Dame Disney picture image

Quasimodo singing “Out There” Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

So why isn’t Disney going to make a Live Action Hunchback? It makes more sense than a live action  Lion King or sequel to Jungle Book. The reason why they won’t is money, pure and simple. Hunchback of Notre Dame was not a money marker for Disney. Sure, it made its budget back but only barely and it was not a toy seller. I would hazard a guess that since there doesn’t appear to be the same amount of nostalgic love for the movie that can be easy quantified like with money, Disney assumes the fanbase isn’t there and there is no need for a remake.

Frollo singing Hellfire Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Frollo singing Hellfire Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

On the flip-side, Disney might want to consider making a remake. Hunchback always seemed a little out of step with other family friend movies  and yet the parts of the Hunchback that were the most Disney-esque were the most hated parts (the gargoyles). A remake would give the company a chance to retcon the parts of Hunchback that REALLY worked and fixed parts that brought the movie down. It could be combined in part with the new musical or just follow the book a little more closely.

Djali Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda & Djali Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

Do I think Disney will ever make a  Hunchback  live action remake? Maybe, wouldn’t completely rule it out but it won’t for a long while if ever.

Been sick and life got in the way. Next week we’ll be back to the ballet. Sorry for the delay but in the meantime,

this,

I never knew they had this set. Though I think I had only one or two Polly Pocket sets as a kid so I’m not a good model of Polly Pocket knowledge or merchandise.

Esmeralda singing God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda singing God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

I’m not strictly speaking in the interest of my own personal enjoyment or in the sense that it would give me more context but with the political and social climate in America, Hollywood or Disney really should get a new version into production.

 

Esmeralda (Maureen O'Hara) 1939 Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda (Maureen O’Hara)

 

America right now is politically divided on many, many issues  and  a big one is the issue of immigration and refugees. In some ways it’s a complex issue mainly on the bureaucracy end  but on the side of basic human decency and the fact that America is an immigrant nation  it’s pretty simple. So how does this tie into making a Hunchback movie and the necessity of one?

Esmeralda Illustration Image picture

19th century Illustration of Esmeralda

I truly can not speak to the historical aspect of the Romani in Paris in the 15th century but the book makes it sound like Paris was a Sanctuary city. This means in a sense you could look at Esmeralda as a refugee or at the very least she is an immigrant of sorts. This is only case in versions where she is a Romani and not following the book, which is fine. I suppose they could split the different and make her half French and half Romani or Spanish since Esmeralda’s father is a complete unknown. The only hint the book offers, that I can find, is Esmeralda’s father could have been a thief that left her mother before she learned she was pregnant. Then again this information is narrated by a secondary character, so it unknown how reliable this account is.

    

Esmeralda and Quasimodo Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda defying Frollo by helping Quasimodo Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

In any case the two major American versions that have Esmeralda as a Romani depicts her as an advocate for both her people and the “downtrodden” which aside from being her a good female role-model in these two versions, her being an advocate  great aspect to showcase to a film going population.

 

Salma Hayek as Esmeralda, 1997 The Hunchback picture image

Salma Hayek as Esmeralda,

Also unlike some other movies that cast people regardless of their race, Hunchback should be a little more set in character’s cultural backgrounds. I heard when Rogue One was coming out there was a call to boycott the movie because of the diversity the cast, same for Star Wars The Force Awakens, which is dumb.   With Hunchback their cultural backgrounds inform the characters so aside from Esmeralda and in many cases Clopin, the rest of the cast are white Europeans which could help ease some people into the movie, especially people who wanted to boycott an iconic Space Fantasy movie series.

 

Gigi Radics picture image

Gigi Radics

This means the casting of Esmeralda become extremely important. I should preface that in a perfect world, anyone could play Esmeralda but we don’t and if a movie is going to characterized Esmeralda a very specific ethnic group even though the book did not, then the movie needs to cast accordingly. This is why the casting of Gigi Radics, a Hungarian singer of Romani descent would be a masterstroke of casting. Whether or not she is available or willing to play the role is a different question.  They could always cast an unknown Romani actress to take the part.  Casting an Indian or Pakistani, or Arab actress is not quite as authentic but it a step in the right direction.

 

Esmeralda singing God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda singing God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

A new Hunchback  movie today who help shed some light on the current situation in America and recontextualize to people who may not think it about as much and ignore the news. It might even help  people who have little exposure to immigrants and refugees  put a human face on the issue instead of short sound bite.