Frollo’s Guide to Seducing a Women

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Frollo is a Ladies' Man Hunchback of Notre Dame disney

Frollo is a Ladies’ Man

(based on the wonderful book)

  1.  Stalk her
  2. Insult her in public
  3. Accuse her of a crime that you committed
  4. Condemn her to die
  5. When she is in jail, confess your feeling but remember don’t let her talk
  6. Proposition her for sex
  7. Try to force yourself on her
  8. Give her an ultimatum; The tomb of your Bed
  9. If all else fails, weep like a child
  10. But most importantly be Persistent

 

Follow these 10 easy steps and the women will be your’s or dead, but if you can’t have her no should.

(Behind the scene factoid – The chocolates that Frollo is “holding” are Ghirardelli Valentine’s Chocolate Squares,  however I changed name of to “Gobbo” which is Italian for Hunchback)

Hunchback in Black

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He Rings the Bells by Day and deals with Aliens by Night

Quasimodo Hunchback Notre Dame Men in Black Parody picture image 2012

Quasimodo, Hunchback in Black

He is Quasimodo, The Hunchback of The Men in Black

Frollo loves Cats and Anime

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Frollo from the 1939 version loves anime kitty-cats

Frollo loves Anime Cats picture image

Frollo loves Anime Cats

For those of you who care the cats are from the following anime  Azumanga Daioh, Nyan Koi, Natsume Yuujinchou, School Rumble, Ramna 1/2 Sailor Moon, Nyanpire, Fushigi Yuugi, Sweet Home Chii, Jewel Pet, Nichjou, Hello Kitty, Full Moon wo Sagashite, Pokemon, Sankarea, Trigun, and My Neighbor Totoro.

 

 

 

 

From Vaudeville to Toll Booth

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You may not know this but around the turn of 19th century, Quasimodo decided to move out of   Notre Dame to pursue his dream of being on the stage. He joined the ranks of Vaudeville where he became a star.

Quasimodo as a Vaudeville Star picture image

Quasimodo as a Vaudeville Star

In 1922 he got wind that Universal was doing a movie version of Hunchback and he decided to leave the stage and take the plunge into “moving picture” but he lost the role of Quasimodo to Lon Chaney because his movement were to subtle for the screen and he was just too “nice” in his depiction of himself.

After that he tried to return to the stage but he never reached the same level of stardom and when vaudeville cease to be Quasimodo once again tried the silver screen. He got a few bit roles here and there but sadly all of his films are considered lost. After 1936 Quasimodo went out the public eye. Recently however he was spotted working at a Toll Booth somewhere in New Jersey. Keep a look out for him, you may see him one day.

Quaimodo at work in a Toll Booth image image

Quaimodo at work in a Toll Booth

Hunchback Kart

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Which Notre Dame Character would win  in race a la Mario Kart , car racing with random weapons and weird tracks. (based on book)

Hunchback of Notre dame meets Mario Kart Disney

Hunchback Kart

 

I would say that Quasimdo wouldn’t because of his vision. Frollo would just follow Esmeralda so he wouldn’t win. Sister Gudule won’t win either because she too busy looking for her baby. Jehan could win but he would try to aim for coins and prizes. Esmeralda could win as she quick but she is flighty too and might get distracted by Phoebus. Gringoire might do well but he also might get distracted. Phoebus could win because he’s a no-good cheater but he might let a lady win you know in order to sleep with them later. Clopin could win but like Jehan he might go after coins and prizes. Djali could do well as she a very talented goat but I would say Fleur de Lys would win most of the time because she is cold calculating bitch who always win, let’s not forget she’s the only character in the book to have a “happy ending.”

 

Which Hunchback do you think would win in a battle royale kart race? I chose the book but feel free to use Disney in your response ^^


Belle + Silly Shenanigans= This Video

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This video is from 2009, The original Notre Dame de Paris Trio performed Belle on the Show “Vive les Comedies Musicales” and they switched out who they were singing to so that they addressed each other.  The result, a silly rendition of Belle.