Here is my super off the cuff Tepid Reactions or Tepid Takes to the some new stuff from Disney

Disney’s newest Pinocchio…

Let’s start with the newest remake on the block, Pinocchio. Apparently there is also new Pinocchio this year including a Paul Shore movie, a dark looking video and the upcoming stop motion Del Toro version. I half-think Disney rushed this to get ahead of Del Toro’s

Now personally, I only ever saw the 1940 Pinocchio once in school. I never liked it. I like Figaro and Monstro end of list. So this was always going to be super pass for me. I’ve seen reviews on this and they do not recommend it. Skip it do anything else with your time, you can never get your time back. (The video is from a reviewer who saw the movie I just didn’t want to post the trailer or get picture)

Did Once upon a time do the live action thing better? Remember Pinocchio was a big part of the first season. In fact he is the reason why the story happens the way it does…..

Trailer for The Little Mermaid

The Little mermaid teaser trailer. The ONLY issue I have is the lighting. It’s dark. Why? Because it’s a teaser trailer and the effects are not done. It could why her tail is super day-glow but everything is not because Ariel tail color is like a point pride. I think I read that somewhere.

Ultimately I do not care who Disney casts, I really do not. No one cared with Once upon a Time when they did the same thing. The trouble is did Once do these live action remakes better??? I think they did……

I will save judgment for a full trailer.

Disenchanted

The Enchanted sequel trailer….. sort of liked it no lies. Probably will watch when it comes out. Do I think it will be the best movie of 2022? No probably not but I doubt it will be the worst and that is at least something.

I’m most liking missing stuff. I know there was Star wars news. I know there was a news piece that the Hunchback version is still in the works. Which good or terrible is fine for me. THOUGH it would be interesting how the studio could make it worse. Can one make the gargoyles worse? Yes. Or could they create something far worse than the gargoyles? Yes.

I do think that since Hunchback is a lesser movie in the studio’s option because of money that they will just leave the production to it own thing which could result in a better end production. OR the executives could meddle as means of over correcting giving us something very bad. We shall see when ever this movie comes out with some pictures or a rushed teaser trailer to show investors or the D23 crowd.

A Were-Human/Mermaid, A Sea Witch in Disguise and a Prince

It’s a Little Mermaid DIY Costume Buying Guide! Because it’s a the spooky Halloween season there needs to be more costume content.

So it’s The Little Mermaid’s turn.

Ariel’s Human Costume

Ariel’s Blue Dress

Ariel, the titular Little Mermaid, as a plethora of costumes to wear for Halloween fun spooky times. They are great and super iconic. But oddly enough it’s the blue dress she wears on her outing with Prince Eric that is quite similar in type to Esmeralda’s costume which is why it’s the Ariel costume of this post. PLUS it’s good if you live in a cooler climate. What you will need. A light blue long blue shirt or Blouse, a long blue skirt, black corset, black kitten heels, a big blue hair bow and red wig

Ariel’s Top

You could also go for white or dye it if you feel like it. It’s not hard to dye things just can be hard to get the color right.

Ariel’s Top option #1: Hanes Women’s Sport Cool Dri Long Sleeve Crewneck T-Shirt, Moisture-Wicking Performance Tee

Ariel’s Top option #2: Ekouaer 2 Pack Women’s Scoop Neck Tops Long Sleeve Slim Fit T Shirt Thermal Shirts Basic Tight Tee XS-XXL

Ariel’s Top option #3: LYANER Women’s Casual Square Neck Long Sleeve Plain Blouse Shirt Top

Ariel’s Skirt

Ariel’s Skirt option #1: v28 Women Full/Ankle Length Elastic Pleated Retro Maxi Chiffon Long Skirt

Ariel’s Skirt option #2: Sinono Womens Chiffon Retro Maxi Skirt Vintage Ankle-Length Skirts

Ariel’s Skirt option #3: Ladies 20 Yard Elegant Satin Long Full Skirt for Ballroom Belly Dance Performance Costume Dress

Ariel’s Black Corset

A less expensive option could be a simple black tube top

Ariel’s Corset option #1: Daisy corsets womens Sleeveless

Ariel’s Corset option #2: MixMatchy Women’s Casual Strapless Basic Sexy Tube Top

Ariel’s Corset option #3: Women’s Vintage Strapless Open Back Boned Mesh Bustier Zip Back Corset Bodyshaper Crop Top

Ariel’s Black Heels

Any black shoes that you have should work. A low heel is more in line with Ariel’s outfit but it’s all good no matter what you have on hand.

Ariel’s Shoe option #1: Clarks Womens Linvale Jerica

Ariel’s Shoe option #2: DREAM PAIRS Women’s Luvly Bridal Wedding Party Low Heel Pump Shoes

Ariel’s Shoe option #3: JOY IN LOVE Women’s shoes Low Heels Pointy Toe Kitten Heel Daily Pumps

Ariel’s Hair Bow

Be sure it’s a large bow because it’s a statement piece in the look.

Ariel’s Hair Bow option #1: Sky Blue Jumbo Bow Clip with Tails

Ariel’s Hair Bow option #2: Hair Clips Boutique Hair Bows Alligator Clip for Women Girl Hairpin 6 Inch TSFJ02 (Light Blue)

Ariel’s Hair Bow option #3: Blue Hair Bows,2 PCS Satin Hair Bows Clip Big Blue Bow for Women Hair Ribbons Long Tail Hair Bow Hair Barrettes for Wedding Prom Party Charm (Light Blue,Royal Blue)

Ariel’s Wig

Normally I would say wigs are a fun add-on but Ariel’s vibrant red hair is so iconic, so if you can get a wig please do.

Red Wig option #1: Red Wig for Women Cosplay Costume Halloween Party Wigs Long Curly Wavy Wig

Red Wig option #2: LABEAUTÉ Max Beauty Red Mermaid Wigs with Starfish Hair Clips, Curly Long Hair Daily Wig Heat Resistant Synthetic Fiber for Halloween for Cosplay for Christmas (Red 1)

Red Wig option #3: Daenerys Targaryen Wig for Game of Thrones Khaleesi Long Curly Wavy Hair Wigs BU121B

Vanessa a.k.a The Sea Witch in Disguise

Vanessa, The Little Mermaid

In The Little Mermaid, Ursula disguises herself as a human and enchants Eric using Ariel’s voice. So it’s a double costume because you’re dressing up as someone in dress-up, costume inception.

Ursula as Vanessa has three looks but again this one has the elements of Esmeralda’s costume plus the other two looks are under-garments and a wedding gown but hey it’s Halloween so those looks would not be out of place.

Vanessa’s purple outfit consists of a dark purple corset, light purple skirt, and golden nautilus shell necklace. For shoes you could go for anything BUT she does where black flat and it does look like heels during the beach scene. You can get wig of you need one and a cloak since again she wears one on the beach when she enchants Eric. Girl is a siren.

Vanessa’s Top

Allow me to be real with you, it’s HARD to find something like Vanessa’s top on offer at Amazon. I tried. Also I’m ignoring the lace up detail.

Vanessa’s Top option #1: REORIA Butsmooth® Womens Basic Sexy Square Neck Sleeveless Tank Tops Bodysuits Clubwear

Vanessa’s Top option #2: Womens Square Neck Double Lined Tank Tops Low Back Fitted Sleeveless Tops

This one is lighter in color but the shape it right

Vanessa’s Top option #3: GRACE KARIN Bustier Corset Top for Women Sexy Slim Cami Tank Top Black White Summer Sleeveless Party

Vanessa’s Skirt

Vanessa’s skirt is lighter purple. Most likely it’s a dress with a corset-like thing over it hence the insert but separates are easier.

Vanessa’s Skirt option #1: ASHER FASHION Women’s Bohemian Style Elastic Waist Band Cotton Linen Long Maxi Skirt Dress

Vanessa’s Skirt option #2: Sinono Womens Chiffon Retro Maxi Skirt Vintage Ankle-Length Skirts

Vanessa’s Skirt option #3: Scarlet Darkness Maxi Long Skirt for Women Double Layered Renaissance Skirts

Nautilus/Conch Shell Necklace

This a must. It’s the piece that holds Ariel’s voice. Try to get some black cording or even shoe lace for a more accurate look.

Nautilus Shell Necklace option #1: Meiligo® Fashion Woman Conch,snail,shell Charm pendant necklace (Gold) 2

Nautilus Shell Necklace option #2: 18K Gold Stainless Steel Bee Honeycomb Necklace, Star Moon Necklace Dinosaur Necklace spider Necklace Adjustable Y Lariat Necklace for Women

Nautilus Shell Necklace option #3: CLASSYZINT Gold Choker Necklace For Women Sun Heart Flower Charms Pendant Necklace Chunky Gold Statement Necklace

Extra Touches

If you need a wig by all means get one. You can also get a dark purple cape for added warmth. For shoes, see the Ariel’s shoe recommendations as Vanessa is pretty much a villainous Ariel look-like. But for shoes you can get away with whatever you think suits.

Brown Wig option: MapofBeauty 40″ 100cm Anime Costume Long Straight Cosplay Wig Party Wig (Dark Brown)

Dark Purple Cloak option: Colorful House Unisex Full Length Velvet Hooded Cape Halloween Christmas Cloak

Prince Eric (for the guys)

Prince Eric

Prince Eric is Ariel’s main romantic interest.

Anyway, Eric’s outfit is fairly easy to acquire. White shirt, dark blue pants, red waistband, and boots. You can add a black wig if you want.

Eric’s White Shirt

Eric’s White Shirt option #1: Mens Medieval Pirate Shirt Viking Renaissance Lace up Mercenary Halloween Scottish Jacobite Ghillie Tops

Eric’s White Shirt option #2: Beninos Mens Long Sleeve Slim Fit Dress Shirts

Eric’s White Shirt option #3: NITAGUT Men Henley Neck Long Sleeve Daily Look Linen Shirts

Eric’s Pants

I’d say any blue pants you have. Eric’s pants are a slim fit but whatever you have should work. His pants do seems to be knee length with a cuffs but it’s not a deal breaker if your look lacks this detail.

Eric’s Pants option #1: Alamo Slim-Fit Chinos Pants Men – Classic Breathable Flat-Front Chino Pants for Men

Eric’s Pants option #2: mens 4-way Stretch Dress Casual Pants, Blue, 32W x 30L US

Eric’s Pants option #3: Perry Ellis Portfolio Very Slim Men’s Dress Pants, Stretch Non-iron Fabric, Flat Front, Soft and Durable Slacks for Men

Eric’s Red Waistband

Eric’s outfit has a pirate-ish look so the red waistband makes sense. Or a cummerbund would also work well.

Eric’s Red waistband option #1: ThePirateDressing Pirate Medieval Renaissance Halloween Costume Large Sash

Eric’s Red waistband option #2: Satin Pirate Sash Pirate Medieval Renaissance Large Sash Halloween Costume Waist Sash Belt

Eric’s Red waistband option #3: Alizeal Mens Paisley/Solid Pre-tied Party Adjustable Bow Tie, Cummerbund and Pocket Square Gift Set

Eric’s Boots

Should be black and knee high. If you got them, rock them

Eric’s boot option: Ellie Shoes Men’s 125-matey Knee High Boot

Black Wig

Again, a wig is not necessary for Eric’s costume but it’s still a fun addition.

Black Wig option: STfantasy Men Short Wigs Male Guy Layered Wavy Halloween Cosplay Anime Party for Dad Hair (Natural Black)

Esmeralda singing God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame picture image

Esmeralda singing God Help the Outcast Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame

As mentioned before  Hunchback versions seldom ever passes The Bechdel Test, including the Disney version read here.  But it made me think about the other Disney movies. I was going to go through and look at each movie but I  don’t have to because this site  did all the work for me, http://disney-blog.com/2011/05/the-bechdel-test-and-disney-films/. But I’m going to offer some analysis.

Disney Princess Line UP with Esmeralda, Megara and Kida, picture image

Disney Princess Line UP with Esmeralda, Megara and Kida

As a refresher, to pass the test a work needs to meet 3 criteria; 1) It has to have at least two named female characters, 2) That talk to each other 3) About something other than a male.  Most movies fail the Bechdel test. Also passing or failing does not indicate the quality of a movie. Terrible movie pass and great movies fail.

Aurora and Prince Phillip Sleeping Beauty picture image

Aurora and Prince Phillip Sleeping Beauty

So what does this mean for Disney?  Well the purpose of the test is show the  female presence in a given movie.  Interestingly enough the older movies, Snow White, Cinderella, and Sleeping Beauty all pass. Which is valid as at least with Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty  there is a decent amount of named female characters. Though movies that don’t have lots of female characters still pass, like 101 Dalmatians, Peter Pan, Hercules, and even The Emperor’s New Groove, which is a male buddy comedy.

Jasmine Aladdin picture image

Jasmine

Movies like Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty are often criticized for passive lead female characters but the most of the characters in the movies are females. So having one strong likable female character doesn’t help the over-all female presence. Like Aladdin fails, hard.

Ariel's Fin The Little Mermaid picture image

Ariel

I would disagree with The Little Mermaid failing as the site says because Ariel and Ursula had a fairly long conversation about a few topics, I would give it a pass.  The Lion King could have passed if Nala and Sarabi had spoken more. I’m a little unsure if Snow White should have gotten the pass, as the Queen has a name but after the fact. Her name isn’t said in the movie. Though to be fair, I haven’t seen Snow White in a very long time.

Elsa and Anna frozen picture image

Elsa and Anna

I do find it interesting that with modern day Disney movies that are Princess that try to aim with boys in mind they do keep a strong female presence. Tiana with her mother, Rapunzel with her “mother” and the sisters of Frozen.

Yzma The Emperor's New Groove picture image

Yzma

I would  thought more Disney movies would have failed but it pretty mixed. It’s just really interesting that the older princess movies have a stronger female presence than the Disney movies that have a single “strong” and “Independent”  female character.

Walt Disney Records The Legacy Collection: The Little Mermaid by Lorelay Bove picture image

Walt Disney Records The Legacy Collection: The Little Mermaid by Lorelay Bove

 

Because its Cyber Monday I thought I would post more terrible Disney Princess Products but in my search I found The Legacy of Collection of The Little Mermaid which featured the art of Lorelay Bove. For some reason this made look her up.  I really like the colors and texture of her work and I was curious  to see if she had done any Hunchback artwork but then I found this book.

LOVELY: LADIES OF ANIMATION: THE ART OF Lorelay Bove, Brittney Lee, Claire Keane, Lisa Keene, Victoria Ying and Helen Chen picture image

LOVELY: LADIES OF ANIMATION: THE ART OF Lorelay Bove, Brittney Lee, Claire Keane, Lisa Keene, Victoria Ying and Helen Chen

LOVELY: LADIES OF ANIMATION: THE ART OF Lorelay Bove, Brittney Lee, Claire Keane, Lisa Keene, Victoria Ying and Helen Chen. Lisa Keene worked The Hunchback of Notre Dame as the character designer but she also has done background work on a lot of other Disney movies. While I can’t  say for sure if it has any Hunchback art in it or no it os full of beautiful art work. So if you know someone who like me and loves art book and animation with would make a great gift.

The Art of the Disney Golden Books (Disney Editions Deluxe) picture image

The Art of the Disney Golden Books (Disney Editions Deluxe)

 

There is also this The Art of the Disney Golden Books (Disney Editions Deluxe). Again I’m not sure if does have Hunchback in it but it seems more likely.  Again would make a great gift for though who like art books and Disney movies.

Ariel and Erin on the Beach, The Little Mermaid  picture image

Ariel and Erin on the Beach, The Little Mermaid

People like to think that The Little Mermaid , Ariel, was more than likely traumatized by her wedding night and the goings on of human sex opposed to her “fishy” ways. Well, for those people who think they are oh so clever, I’m going to say  that she more than likely was not. I’m not a scientist but I do enjoy studying evolution and Ariel has several features that indicate that Mermaids are mammals and would give birth and have sex and not lay a clutch of eggs.

People claim  that mermaids reproduce like fish, in that females lay a clutch of eggs and males fertilized them. However, let’s just look at some traits of Ariel’s that show they are not related to fish and they for wouldn’t reproduces this way. Three traits and two are stupid obvious so we’ll start with the one that people would not think of; Ariel’s fins.

 

Ariel's Fin The Little Mermaid picture image

Ariel’s Fin, The Little Mermaid

Ariel’s fins, like all mermaids’s are horizontal much like dolphin’s and whale’s fins. Fish fins are vertical. But what does this mean? This reflects the evolutionary locomotion of the animal.  Fish evolved from creatures that moved from side to side and the vertical tail allows for that motion or what is called lateral undulation. Dolphins and whales evolved from land mammals and they adapted an up and down locomotion  or dorsoventral undulation. This means that for mermaids to have these fins they would have to evolved from land creatures.

Ariel Disney The Little Mermaid picture image

Ariel Disney The Little Mermaid

 

Then we have the two traits that make it very, very clear, that mermaids are mammals; Mermaids has breasts and Bellybuttons. These two traits make it so clear that Mermaids give birth to live young that I’m not sure where the Fish egg idea came from, probably from that Futurama episode. However belly buttons, or navel, are where the umbilical cord is attached. All placental mammals have a navels. Breasts are mammary glands found on the upper torso of primates. The purpose of which is to feed milk to offspring.  This means that Mermaids are  mammals who nurse their young and navels indicate that they would get pregnant.

 

Ariel Kiss the Girl Little Mermaid picture image

Ariel making icky face

 

I think the only thing Ariel might have been weirded out by would that Eric doesn’t keep his genitalia inside his body like marine mammals.

Der Glöckner von Notre Dame picture image

Der Glöckner von Notre Dame

Der Glöckner von Notre Dame is a German musical based on the Disney version. It premiered in Berlin in 1999 and it’s music and lyrics were written by Alan Menken and Stephen Schwartz respectfully. This was the first musical Disney produced that premiered in another country and it was one of Germany’s longest running musicals, it ran for 3 years.

 

What makes the musical great is that it does a great job of mitigating between the Disney version and the original book. The characters are more fleshed out and the childish tone is taken away even with the gargoyles (yup they’re in the musical too).

 

Both Menken and Schwartz have confirmed that there will be Broadway version of Der Glöckner von Notre Dame and it will be called The Hunchback of Notre Dame even though Der Glöckner von Notre Dame doesn’t mean “The Hunchback of Notre Dame” it means “The Bell-ringer of Notre Dame” but whatever, I’m sure it’s a marketing thing. This talk of an American version has been in the works since 2008, so don’t get excited till some casting has been announced. Other question is how much are they going to revamp for the American version. I hope they don’t change the ending.

 

Broadway version of Beauty and the Beast picture image

Broadway version of Beauty and the Beast

Broadway version of The Little Mermaid picture image

Broadway version of The Little Mermaid

Broadway version of The Lion King image picture

Broadway version of The Lion King

 

 

 

 

 

 

With American version on Broadway it will follow in the other Disney musicals like; Beauty and the Beast, The Little Mermaid, The Lion King, Aladdin; Mary Poppins and the upcoming The Jungle Book and Dumbo.

 

Disclaimer- I just wanted to say that for this review keep a few things in mind, #1 I don’t speak German (I can read translations but translation are not always great) and #2 since there is no official performance recording (at least that I know of), pictures will be minimal. I’ll try to find some but can’t promises lots of pictures in every post I do on Der Glöckner von Notre Dame.

 

Next Time- Plot

Frollo and Quasimodo Der Glöckner von Notre Dame  picture image

Frollo and Quasimodo Der Glöckner von Notre Dame

Disney started releasing Direct to video(DVD) movies in 1994 with The Return of Jafar. Disney continued to bastardized their theatrical releases till 2007 with a prequel to The Little Mermaid called  Ariel’s Beginning. Since then they just release  TinkerBell movies.

The Hunchback of Notre Dame II 2 Sequel Disney

The Hunchback of Notre Dame II

A handful of the film are decent but many are just crap including the March 19 2002 release of the sequel of The Hunchback of Notre Dame . It features some of the same characters (excluding Frollo because if got lucky and was killed off in the first film).  Quasimodo, Clopin, Esmeralda, Phoebus, Djali, Achilles and the annoying ones are back in drab colors but with the original voice actors. There also three new dull as toast characters. Plus shit for music, art design and animation.

 

If you haven’t figured out it I think this movie is crap.

 

Next Time – The Crapastic Plot

The Hunchback of Notre Dame II Disney picture image

Disney's The Hunchback of Notre Dame II